Creating Lasting Change: The Triad of Peace, Focus and Energy

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Today on the podcast, I’m extending my thought from yesterday, just today, I answered a listener question. The question was about focus, what to do when you cannot focus? But will the question and I said that there is a lot of literature available that can tell you how to increase your focus. But there isn’t a lot that’s available, or at least not in context. Wherein they tell you what you have to do. Once you lost focus, the recovery of focus is expensive. That was my point on yesterday’s podcast. Please listen to yesterday’s podcast before you listen to this. Because if you’re listening to this on a podcasting app, this will play first. And yesterday’s podcast will play second, I suggest you listen to yesterday’s one first, and then come back and listen to this one. I’m just continuing where I left off yesterday, every time a listener calls in, or texts me with a question, they’re trying to make a change. And they have come to a conclusion that the change that they’re trying to make is expensive, not from a monetary standpoint. But from a time standpoint, they have given it, whatever they have, their understanding their effort, their time, they have given to that change that they’re seeking. And now they’re not able to, and they are feeling that they are wired far away from the outcome. So they reach out. And people like me, and me, we believe at least I believe that nobody can create a change within you, other than yourself. And I’ve said it multiple times that the best individual who knows you is you. Because you deal with your stuff unconditionally.

The challenge is because you’re so close to yourself. Sometimes you can’t use your eyes to see yourself. All you see your reflection, you see yourself in the mirror, but you don’t see yourself. Others can see you I can see you. If I meet you, I can see you and I have a different image in my mind. Different than what you had, because you only see yourself in the mirror. And philosophically, this discussion is deep, what I’m trying to say deep, but hopefully you get the point. So when you can’t see yourself, how do you make changes. The only way to approach change is because you can think your thoughts. You can analyze your feelings and emotions. And that’s the only mirror you have really to see yourself. But sometimes these are also convoluted. These are difficult, very difficult to tame emotions difficult to contain feelings very hard, it needs a lot of practice, it needs yes and years of effort. If you’re naturally inclined, then great. But then it’s very difficult once you are not blessed with that part of the mind. But the good part is it’s a learnable thing, it can be learned. So there is lot of information again, how you can do it. All you have to have is that inquisitiveness within you that I do seek that information, then you should get it clearly. The simple way to really get focused back. This is a technique that I use. And I’ve talked about this, I’ve done videos and talk shows and seminars. Because I’m also looking and I’m also seeking answers.

So turns out that if you go back to yesterday’s podcast, and I said this year, I said you know there is an inside world, there is an outside world. Inside, you make some modifications outside, you make some modifications, and most of the times these modifications, the things that you need to modify are clearly known. I talked about this on yesterday’s podcast, you modify those, you get back focus on it over time, we’ll get back focus. But it’s better to prevent the situation from happening. So once you are in the flow, it’s better to maintain the flow and keep the momentum going. Every time you start something and you get excited you start and you drop off. Every restart is expensive. So you’ve put the first gear on in your car or on the bike. The ride is smoother when you get to the top most gear and your goal is to get to the top most gear. If you keep on starting the car and you keep on switching it off the ignition, then you maybe every 10 seconds to stop the car, you can’t get to the destination you get to the point so Prevention, fairly simple way to prevent focus from going away, which is to put in a good self talk routine.

Recently, two weeks ago, I talked about this on one of my radio shows three weeks ago, a good self talk routine. In the self talk, you talk about your goals, your purpose, your actions, your intentions, you clarify them as a part of your self talk. Now, very simple self talk means you talk to yourself. The problem is, people do not have a good self talk. Each one of us, we all talk to ourselves, that’s why we are who we are. We are humans. Every individual internally talks to himself or herself, that talk most of the times his negative things like why this is happening to me, how come this happening to me why things don’t happen the way I expect them to happen? When will these things get When will I get them right or when they will get themselves right before I get what I want, why people are like this, why situations are like that. So this is the general gist of the talk sequence. Not with everyone, but most. And that is why an industry called self improvement, personal development, coaching, mentoring therapy types. Because the root of everything is the talk. But there is also another route to this, which is you cannot fix a talk unless you fix the thought. So thinking is important. And that’s what I was making a point yesterday. What two years ago, I did a video, it’s available on my YouTube channel, talking about how to make inner positive changes. And I said, self talk is what modifies your soul. So you wake up in the morning, you curse yourself, you curse the higher power, you curse people around you curse events and things and everything around you, then what you’re doing is you’re casting your soul.
Now once the soul is disengaged, is broken, it stepped upon, then it’s very difficult to create something big or anything big. So I, you know, upbringing is important. You did not have a good upbringing, then once you gained awareness, it’s in your hands right now, to really groom yourself from this point on doesn’t matter how old you are about how young you are.

Now you say, Okay, I’m gonna take charge of this, whatever it is, and I’m going to build the next 5, 10, 15, 20, whatever number of years, I’m going to build it my way. And I’m going to undo that which has been done to me when I was not in control. How to do this? Well, again, you bring in positive words, thank you. Welcome. You put in a talk sequence. You say now that I’ve got on this day. And again, I’ve done multiple podcasts on this. And you know, why talk is important and what kind of a talk you have to have more than happy to send you those recordings. If you need them, let me know just text me. In the self talk, I don’t find fault with anyone, I take responsibility. In the self talk, I show gratitude in the self talk, I express my feelings to the higher power to myself. And it’s very simple sequence. Why? Because I want to engage the soul self talk is the only way to engage the soul. And that is why it now says all these things come in within the space of self talk. So you talk to your soul. That means you’re talking to yourself. If you’re talking to yourself, you better talk the right way. Using the right words in the right context. When you do that, and you do that, effectively, you’re you’ll create peace, but a good self talk routine eliminates scattered thinking automatically, if you remove scattered thinking scattered thoughts. That means the dominant thought takes the mind space. If there is only one thought that takes the mind space that dominates completely takes the space then you now have focus automatically. Now there is more to self talk. A good self talk routine also creates trust. And trust means that every time you see yourself in the mirror you have positive reflection of you. A positive reflection creates energy. We will ask this question Where do I get energy? Posture reflection then And now you are that’s the secret. That’s that’s what takes you to that screech, the change. So the three elements to any change, focus, energy and peace. And the entire life is between these three things. The Triad, peace, focus energy, I just wanted to add this. And I forgot as a part of yesterday’s podcast.

So I’m glad because the support cast usual radio shows we can’t do that because I’d wait for a week or whenever my next show is. But then on a podcast like this, I can come back and add an undo myself at a whole different level. Hopefully this is helpful. And if it is, let me know. And we’ll have some more discussions on this in the coming few days. That’s all for now. Wherever you are, be safe, and I’ll talk to you as early as tomorrow. Bye now.

What to do When you Can’t Focus

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Every time I turn the microphone on to record the podcast, I feel honored because you make my life easier when somebody asks a question, then it’s so easy to turn the microphone on and record. Of course, I do my research and all that, but easier. But when I have to come here and record something on my own from nothing, it’s very hard to create something.

So today on the podcast, again, I have a great feeling because a question has come in from a longtime listener of my radio shows, asking me about focus. Sweeney, I’ve been having difficulty lately focusing, don’t know what to do. I tried many things and thought of reaching out to you. Now, before answering this question before even pressing the record button here. I was thinking, that I did respond to a similar question a few months ago. And I went back and started searching for that recording, but I couldn’t find it. So I thought, Okay, I’ll just record today’s podcast and answer this question. Very interesting. Also, because it’s something else that is going on. As I’m recording this. There are so many distractions that I’m dealing with right now. And I’m talking about focusing on this forecast. Now we’re dealing with so many distractions. Let’s see how I stay focused on the answer. You tell me, You tell me. Okay.

The first and the foremost thing. And I think this is kind of a disclaimer also, which is there is a lot of information available and how to create focus, and I’ve done many podcast episodes talking about it. But there is not a lot of information or at least some information. That is, to the point concise, I don’t think there is any that talks about how to triage, a situation where somebody has lost focus, because losing focus, and gaining back focus is expensive, that process is expensive. Once you lose focus, getting it back is expensive, there could be many things that might be going wrong. And all of those things have to be understood. If somebody never really started to focus, and they are new to this concept called Okay, I want to do something good for myself, I want to create something. And as a part of that, thinking, they discover that they need to focus. So they will do the basics. And they are off to achieving the outcome and all good. But losing and gaining back is expensive, the gaining back process is expensive. So the idea is not lost. So let’s talk about how to create focus first, and I’ll come back and talk about the triage pot, or getting the back pot. There are four things that are necessary to create focus. And the first and foremost thing is that you need to have a plan that you know what you’re doing, that you know your goal, that you know your time that you know, you’re you applying yourself to something starts with that. So you know the plan the overall plan.

The second part is that you have taken the bigger plan. And you’re cut it down to smaller chunks. So you have small goals that add up to the big goals. We talked about that also earlier on one of the podcast episodes here. Then the third part is that you eliminate all distractions, for your focus to work, or you stay focused on this remote distraction. And then finally, the last one is you maintain energy as you’re doing things. And energy means that you’re taking, you’re hydrating yourself, you’re taking breaks all that whatever it is. So you’re pacing yourself. And you’re positioning yourself the same way 30 minutes an hour or two hours or five hours into something that you were at the beginning, you have the same momentum, you have the same pace. This is how the overall focus thing works.

So there are four elements to it. And you get all this for and you keep on so if sometimes somebody has some issues with focus, most of the time we say okay, the plan correct is your smaller goals. You’re breaking the bigger goals into small ones, then you have distractions removed, and then you are you have the energy. That’s it. Now in my experience working with people I’ve come across two types of doing this work two types of people. People who create focus from the inside out, go into themselves and the crate focus and there are people who derive focus from outside into them. So inside out and outside in so it depends on what kind of an individual you are. And I want you to think over this today, as you’re listening to this, I want you to think about what kind of an individual you are, do you go inward when there is a situation? So you fix it internally in your mind and your heart, and then you come out to the world, or you want, you go out immediately, to fix things so that you internally can be calm. There is no right or wrong to this, it depends on your composition of the individual that you are. And there isn’t any right or wrong way. And both work. So I want to address both in the podcast today. So let’s talk about the insight.

So every time somebody says I lost focus, and let’s say I’m working in a setup I’m working with you, the first thing I’ll try to figure out is I’ll go inside of you, the first thing I’ll do, so questions start like this, are you sleeping well? Are you eating well? Are you hydrating your drinking water and keeping yourself no hydrated? So those are the things that I want to check sleep diet, liquids, all that. So diet is a voluntary function, but also an involuntary function. So you can choose which one you want to eat, but how your system processes that food is involuntary, you don’t have any control. Likewise, sleep, you know, you can start to fall asleep at a specific time, and all that. But you don’t know how much deep sleep you’ll get and all that. So there are some involuntary functions that, by the way, will become better if you voluntarily understand them, and apply yourself. So I’ll go inside, and ask some questions. Now, once I know these are right, and these are in place, the second thing I would do is while you’re trying to do what you’re trying to do whatever it is, are you passionate about it? Do you have a purpose behind what you’re doing that what you’re trying to do, but which you’re trying to accomplish? Obviously, I look into goals. And then I will try to assess the line of intent that is important, I need to know that the intent is in place, the end purpose is in place, and the end goal is in place. So I just want to understand how this individual is calibrating herself or himself to whatever they’re trying to do. So these are, this is the inside part. Usually, there’s something wrong here. And if you fix that part, the focus comes simply. Then we go to the outside world of this individual and the outside world I look into. And I ask questions about people and other people whom this individual tries to make happy and, and ties to their timeline with all his or her actions. And we all do that because we have people who depend on us. We will depend on other people. So it will tie into others’ actions and inactions.

So are these people creating problems? And how are they creating problems, they’re creating physical problems, emotional problems, that need to be understood. So, when you have something, you love someone and they are in trouble, you cannot focus you cannot get your things done. So it’s very natural to lose focus. And people also here means they may not be directly connected by relationships, they could be totally external. I have seen people who are bothered by the political systems, I’ve seen people who are bothered by war and floods and things that are happening in the world that bother their personal internal life. So, if that is the case, then that has to be rationalized, that has to be integrated. And then we look at the outside world also has cluttered stuff around that has to be addressed. So, between passion purpose goals, intentions, sleep diet, and people clutter, you pretty much can get back you know, you solve one or two or maybe three wherever you see the issue. And by simply addressing those you should be able to get back your focus, the simple approach, and the overall idea is this your thought and action has to align.

Your thought and action have to align. So thought means passion, purpose, goals, and intentions, all those things come into action means that you are doing what is necessary to get yourself to the goal. And if these two things are in play, then typically, you’re good to go. This is how I would approach it. As I said, some people want to fix the external environment before, before they can focus. So people say I need to organize things, I need to take out stuff, I need to keep my surroundings clean. Before I can focus, great. Sometimes people say I need to meditate, I need to do things internally before I can focus great. I am an inside-out guy, for most of my life. I’ve been lately trying to be an outside-in guy. So I try to fix things around me before I can focus. It depends. And it’s also a situational tool for depending on your 20s and 30s. People behave and act differently. In the 40s, they act differently in the 50s, they’ll be different. So we are all changing. We are changing with time, we are changing with our growth, and we’re changing with our own situation. So a lot is going on in this.

These are some of the ideas I want you to explore. And if this goes beyond, and you have some issues and challenges, then I say get somebody’s opinion on what’s happening. If you can’t see these areas, sometimes you know when we’re dealing with internal stuff, we become myopic, and we can’t get there. Okay, so that’s all there is to this. I hope I answered your question. If I did, let me know if not also let me know either way.

5 Things To Monitor In Your Life Every Day

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Numerous times on this podcast, I’ve said that you cannot improve anything, or you cannot improve something that you do not measure. So measuring is important. Doesn’t matter whether you have a career situation, you have a financial situation, you have a health situation or any new goals that you want to bring in or anything that you want to accomplish, you have to measure, you need to have baseline numbers across everything that you’re doing. I can tell you everything I do, I have baseline numbers, and those baseline numbers, tell me the delta at any point in time, not that I care. But I care for consistency, I care about reputation, frequency, I don’t care for and improvements. Not that I don’t check my weight every day, I was talking about weight loss yesterday, I don’t check my weight every day. And I don’t check my bank accounts every day. But I need to measure those.

Now, I have baselines and at any point in time I do measure, then I know when all I measured in the past, and I can I see the delta I see the progression, I see the progression, and I can now act based on the data. Now I do that kind of analysis once a month. But then as a part of peak performance as a part of your growth, daily growth. You need to monitor you need to not measure but monitor monitoring is important. The big difference between Monitoring and Measuring monitoring is to check for spikes and extremes. That means something is seriously wrong, you need to act now got to drop everything and act now. And sometimes measuring means that everything is okay. But you still there are some deltas. There are some fluctuations, but nothing in the extreme. So what I want to do on today’s podcast is I want to share with you a few things that I want you to monitor. This is a coaching podcast, been doing this myself. Again, there are many things you should monitor in life. And I’ll run out of time if I seriously, there are so many things to monitor. It’s impossible to monitor everything that’s happening in life. But there are a few things that each one of us should monitor and I’m going to share with you a few things that I have monitored over the years. This is not a complete list. But this is a good list that will help you start thinking in the right direction.

This podcast is not the answer. The podcast is a path through which you can know, you open yourself up to more answers in your own way. There are about five or six things. I was seriously monitoring for a long time in my life, I want to share those with you. Now, as far as monitoring is concerned, I monitor these but measuring pot is completely different. I measure this and many more. But these five or six are absolutely very important. No, no second thoughts. Okay. So let’s get into this. The first and foremost one, you got to monitor your credit cards, you need to monitor your debit cards. And you need to monitor the bank accounts. Because there is a possibility of fraud or some kind of thing with security issues and all that. So you got a monitor. You can add your investment accounts to it and all that is completely up to you. But I would monitor daily accounts, which credit cards, debit cards, and other bank accounts are all daily, daily counts. The second thing I’ll monitor is my calorie intake. And my water intake and a few things but the water and calorie is is what I monitor. Well, these are a monitor now but put in the last few years and became very active physically. But the next one is credit, your credit score. I don’t do it anymore. I used to do it. I have not really done anything with credit in the last 1011 years. I don’t care what the credit score is and all that. But for people who are starting their life or starting their careers or trying to acquire things credit score makes it easier. But I don’t give a lot of value to it. But if you do, then you need to be monitoring your credit score on a daily basis on a daily basis. Because anything could happen. Somebody could put something on your credit that’s gonna make your life miserable, you know unless you don’t resolve it.

So you got to monitor that. Then I also watch screen time. I spent a lot of time on my phone which I shouldn’t be. My goal is to reduce my screen time. It’s very hard in the world that we are in. There’s so much technology playing against you so much AI some so much of it’s so hard to beat these bots But, you know, these are designed to keep you on the apps and on the platform, it’s crazy what’s going on. But you got to, you know, control it, control it, I’m not saying get rid of it, but control it. There’s one other thing I also monitor a lot. In fact, this is, I would say this is a measure, not necessarily monitoring, which is I also watch my gratitude. Gratitude, I think I did a podcast episode this long time ago, every day, I ensured that I say thank you three times, randomly to people who I meet, who are talking, and all that. And I also say sorry, three times.
So if you ever emailed me, there is a possibility that my opening line to you started with the word sorry. And these two words, thank you. And sorry, I promise you, there is no better way to practice humility. I’ve seen people pray, I’ve seen people write poetry and you know, all kinds of things people do, to express gratitude. seen it all, at least in the amount of time I have been at all this. But there is no substitute to thank you and no replacement for sorry.

Now, this is a measure. It’s not necessarily monitored, but I do watch my gratitude quotient. And these are the two attributes. I think those are the four or five, I think five of those. That’s it. Those are the things that I monitor, some fall in the physical health category, some fall in the finance category, some fall in the relationship category, and graduates fall in that. So if you say three times, thank you to your spouse your partner every day and say sorry, to your spouse and partner three times every day, your life is going to be amazing. I promise you. I think that’s about it. We can take this discussion into a career, I can find some things for you to monitor there. But besides the point, the podcast is not about, ideally, what everybody should be doing. It’s more what I do. And these are the five things I do. Hopefully, this is helpful. If it is let me know and I will be in touch as early as tomorrow. Stay tuned. Bye now.