How To Deal With Negativity & Toxic People In Your Life

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Today’s podcast is on motivation. Welcome back to Success for Srini. Happy Tuesday morning to you today’s August 31, 2022. Unbelievable. I don’t know how to say this. I keep repeating myself. Somebody texted me the other day saying Srini you keep talking about your podcast a lot. Talk on the podcast, but don’t talk about your podcast. You’re right I do. Spirit is difficult to express in words. As I said, I think yesterday or the day before yesterday, I said, I never thought I would survive this long. And officially today, I complete me and my team. I can’t take all the credit. Eight months of this podcast, and every day, I’ll tell you, there were days so hard, I thought I lost it. Literally. I never wanted to break the cadence like every day showing up and recording something meaningful, something anybody first-time listener or a repeat listener, a subscriber to the podcast. If they tune in, they’ll get some benefit from it. Something I’m not saying the best, but something. They’re looking for some help on maybe an idea or a thought the podcast will do it for them. You know, I was waking up and looking for motivation. I’ll tell you this. No, this podcast is not a motivational podcast. The idea is to not motivate you, I don’t think this is what I’ve learned. Motivation will get you started. But habit is what keeps you going.

Hence, if you listen to all the earlier episodes, you will see I’m talking about accountability. I’m talking about goals, I’m talking about commitments and determination and daily actions. Those are the areas I don’t talk about motivation a lot. But motivation is a big thing. Honestly, you know, people drop motivation. And I have dropped motivation multiple times, just doing this recording. Even today, today was good. Today is good so far because I’m motivated to do today’s podcast because there is a milestone of eight months I completed I want to come and report that to you. I want to feel good about myself. All that is good. But this is not the level of excitement I have every day because every day is daily. Every day is daily. You see, here is what I have found out and I want to share this with you. No matter what we do. And we do a lot. It is difficult to describe everything in one word. If I ask you, what you do, you do so many things. It’s very difficult to look at you from one angle and say this is the angle. That’s not true. You are accomplishing many things across many aspects of life. Some of you’re struggling. When I say you, I mean myself, my including me, we all have our struggles. But the truth is this we got to generate our own motivation.

See, if you’re in a dead-end job right now you’re in a situation where you don’t know how to get out of you have to generate your own motivation. Yes seminar or workshop or book a podcast like this, or somebody like me, or like a parent or a friend or somebody will help you momentarily. They will create, you know, they take away some of the feelings that you are going through with their, with their talk with their insights, maybe, but then the core motivation has to come from within you. Here’s what I know life is not as boring as you think it is. Work is not meaningless. This is what I was telling myself every time I was recording this podcast every day, life is not boring. The work we do is not meaningless. And there is somebody somewhere seeking something that only you can do. Nobody else can do it. And when you know when that moment comes that somebody says to you that hey, listen, you did something and I benefited from it. I’ll tell you no money, no fame. No Title can replace that. I hear people telling me I’m not getting promoted. I’m not getting a better job. I’m not getting a better house. I listen to that narrative all the time. My question, my counter question to them is, hey, do you have somebody who has ever told you that they are benefiting from what you’re doing? It doesn’t matter how up or how low they are in the hierarchy. I’ll give you an example. I was listening to the best compliment I think somebody was asking someone a celebrity about what is the best compliment and the best compliment the celebrities says they ever got was from, I think from a child, saying thank you, Dad, for doing this or getting this, thank you. That’s it.

So look, a million or 9 million subscribers or followers, or, you know, all these huge media presents celebrity, the best compliment is from the child. So your child is giving you that compliment, you probably are not seeing it, you’re not taking that. And that should be the greatest motivation for you to do what you’re doing. You see, when you get that kind of a compliment, you invest all. So I was like, I never came to this podcast, I’m telling you, God on my side, and I’m recording this and never came to this podcast recorded this thinking that I’m going to generate a client from this, or I’m going to make some money from this. Or I never did. I never did. And I’m praying to God that I stay with that mindset. You know, if I, if I come with that mindset, I compromise everything. Yeah, compromise you. You’re listening in, I compromise you. In fact, I did have a bunch of people reaching out to me, and I discourage them to work with me. I said I don’t worry about it. You know, the reason why anybody like somebody like me, who is doing this is to reach more people so that I can make some money. And that doesn’t cross my mind. Never looked at this as boring. Never looked at this as enthusiasm. Yeah, a few times unmotivated, not because you are not listening, not because my podcast numbers are fluctuating or going down. Never. That was not the source of my mood, my lack of motivation, my lack of motivation was that, hey, if I have this idea, I want to present this. And I don’t know how to present this. How can I make it sound simple to the listener? That was my source of lack of motivation or motivation. I don’t know if there’s a word like that.

So yes, there will be people who are unenthusiastic in your life. Yes, there will be people who are going to drag you down yesterday, people who will look at life and will find everything negative about life. These are the people who see the whole world as a burning pot. My suggestion to you is to stay away from them. It’s not your lack of motivation, but those people are dragging you down. That is what I call mediocrity, or that is what actually, I take that back. That is toxicity. These people have no room in your life. When I meet people who are depressing, like what pulling me down, you know what I do? I take motivation from myself, this is who I am. That tells me that I’m doing something right. My family, my relatives, they like the so nice to me that like so wonderful to me. They’re like, why are you doing this? I heard you on the radio show. Nobody’s calling it your radio show. Why do you do a radio show? I’m not doing a radio show. Why do you spend money doing you know, for my months, for the first nine months, I was on the radio and never made a single dime, I was spending like $5,000 a month. And like, Here I am $45,000 sin of not making a single dime out of it. And I’ll tell you, everybody, I was weak in those moments. And I was talking to people about, you know, some people who I looked up to, I’m telling them, I know mom’s putting all this money. They’re like, why stop spending money? If your business is not working, stop spending money. I’d like my business. And I’m like, okay, and one fine day woke up. And I said these people are asking me to quit radio. And I’m telling you I’m not making money. So maybe I should make money somewhere and still continue radio because they’re asking me not to be in the business of radio, which I did not want to, you know, there was a long time ago, I came across a story, a very, very funny story. So this man was hired to work in a circus. And his job was to clean up after the elephants. So a friend of his started looking into this person’s job. And he was like, what kind of a job you have gotten yourself into? Man, you know, the elephant poops, and you scoop it poops. You scoop and this is not the job. You should be in. Why don’t you leave? Why don’t you quit? This is a friend telling him and this man this pooper scooper. He kind of responds to his friend or asks his friend you want me to quit the show business?

So, you know, it’s all about perspective, how you see something. And luckily, in the business that I’m in, or what I do, you know, I don’t teach anything on this forecast, or I don’t teach much in the seminars and workshops, I tell people to listen to the majority of, of everything, the reason why you are here in a seminar-workshop is to unlearn. But the unlearning the biggest part of unlearning is perspective. So, it’s not a skill issue, it’s not a talent, sort of accumulation of some idea or thought as much as I position it that way. But the real message is to unlearn. And the biggest part of unlearning is perspective. So if somebody had a sense of achievement, and a feeling of belonging, then they will outshine as I show up on this podcast, I have a sense of achievement with this, this eight months sense of achievement, for me, not that I need to impose this on you. And the sense of belonging that cannot be taken away. You can’t measure that with money.

So as long as you have a sense of achievement, and you have a sense of belonging, keep doing what you’re doing, derive your motivation from it, and stop listening to people who have absolutely no idea what you are. In fact, nobody has any idea what you are. And we tell you, it doesn’t matter how long you are with someone and how deep and how well they know you and all that sort of Hocus Pocus, you nobody knows you, you know, and everybody is with you, for their own reasons. Understand, okay, I read this up here, okay, so that you stay with this notion with this emotion, or with this thought, and I’ll catch up with you in a new month, tomorrow, the first of September, and we’ll continue our pursuit only four months left in this year. So if you listen, you have some passions, you have some goals, you got to really get going with whatever you wanted to achieve this year. And if you have something big coming up next year, this is the time to lay the foundation. Okay? So what conduct and think about that, make that a dominant thought. And we will keep the ball rolling here. I’ll see you tomorrow. Okay. Stay tuned.

De-Clutter & Organize Your Life Now

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Welcome back, happy Monday morning to you start a new week, Monday. And we’re almost done with the month of August 2022. As I’m recording this interesting, and very interesting, interesting to me, because I never thought I would survive this long. So I made a commitment to myself, I’m going to do this podcast every day. At the start of this year, I can’t believe I’ve come this far. So today on the podcast, I want to share with you a success secret, which I have shared multiple times on this podcast.

So if you’re struggling to organize yourself, you’re struggling to bring creative thoughts into your mind. If you have some ideas, you have some passions, you want to pursue them, but it’s not happening, then today’s podcast episode is for you. So stay with me, it’s going to be fun. So two backstories, I want to share with you two backstories before I get into the formula here. So a friend of mine, I talked to him pretty much on a daily basis. So I asked him, I said, Hey, how’s it going? Yeah, great, great, you know, all, he shares, everything that’s happening great, because he wants to, he knows what I do. So he wants to keep my levels high. And I’m pushing him to do better in life. So one thing he keeps on saying, and repeating himself, which is I’m cleaning up everything before I start something new. I’m clearing up everything so that I can position myself to do something new. Now, I don’t know if this has crossed your mind. I want to clear up everything on my plate before I start something new. May it may have. I’m not sure. But it has crossed my mind many times in the past.

So every time I talk to him, he keeps repeating that and has been doing it for over three years now. And he keeps telling me that he has so many things to do. Do you have a lot of things to do, who doesn’t have a lot of things to do, we all have, and I have on this podcast, I have shared many different tips on how to organize yourself and how to have routines, and how to have, you know, all the different strategies and techniques. But it’s funny how people create to-do lists. And they never really do anything with them. They never really get to the core of why they’re not able to get things done, why they can’t accomplish or complete them. And they never see the finish lines for some reason and they keep on making themselves accountable. Yeah, have this and I want to do this. But then they are not unable to take themselves out of this mental loop where they’re either stuck with one thing or they’re not doing anything. So how do you overcome this? So this is story number one. Story number two is to do with me. I have found myself multiple times where I was overwhelmed. And I was lost. But so many books to read so many things to do so much to clear up. I’ll tell you at one point, I was buying about 10 to 15 books a week. Knowing that I cannot read all of them. And I was stalking books. At one point, I had about like one full-car garage worth of papers. These are all notes, you know, papers that are from IRS and you know multiple companies’ taxes I did not file. It was like I just hated my literally I would like to wake up in the morning, look at all the things that I have to catch up with and I will literally kill my Spirit every day. Kill my spirit. And I made a promise to myself. I said I want to do something about this. And I let me tell you how long I stayed with it. I stayed with it for about like seven years, seven years every day, and it’s piling up junk. I know I was not a hoarder, but it was piling up.

I knew because I was still coaching people. I didn’t you have the life you quote somebody on what they should do and you’re not doing it. It’s funny. It’s funny, and I see coaches doing it. I’m like, I was like I wake up in the morning. I look at myself in the middle. I can’t see myself distorted everywhere. I’m here trying to tell people and I’m telling people every day on calls, what they should do, and I’m not doing it and the evidence is against me I started giving things away, started giving things away, I started giving away books, all the CDs, all the tapes, all the DVDs, everything just gave them away. Things that I could not give away. I gave them away to Salvation Army. Goodwill, I don’t know, I just gave them away. But still, I had to deal with papers. 100 people, I couldn’t catch up with the paperwork. The more I was seeing the resistance, the more I was seeing my lack of ability to accomplish. I was dying within seven long years. Not a joke. Our lifespan is like, I don’t know. 50 6070 given everything that we’re dealing with, maybe 80 Maybe 100? I don’t know. And here I am not able to catch up. Oh, one more story. Third story. My dad piled up papers, books, you know, almost in his 80s. I told him, I said you, why are you piling up all this? You’re not going to ever get to all this. You got to let this go. And he’s like, no, no, I still have time. I still have time.

One night, he had a stroke. I forgot everything. He forgot my name. He forgot everything. And now everything he has no meaning nothing. I had to purge everything. And then when I came back into my life, I have all these things that I’m wanting to purge, I can’t get my hands on. So I’ll tell you, I hired people. They took care of some stuff. But then there was they could not take care of this emotional stuff I was going through. Then I got some amazing software and scanners to scan all the papers, I got rid of some papers. Mostly the papers went away. But then the processing did not go away. Because mentally I was still holding everything in my mind, even though visibly everything was clean in front of me. But then the real evolution happened when I decided that nothing matters. Nothing matters. So if you cannot come to that realization, anything matters, then I don’t think whatever game you’re playing, you would have the stress. So you’re always thinking about your possessions. Or I have a car, I don’t know what to do with it. I have a house, I don’t know what to do with it. Every time you have possessions gonna kill you. Life is beautiful when you live in emptiness. So today, I’ll tell you, I still have possessions. I’m still trying to get rid of them. But they don’t bother me because I don’t have that affiliation. I’m cleaning my mind as I’m thinking. So when I’m talking to my coaching clients, including this friend of mine, you know, here’s the strategy. Listen, if you’re struggling right now, with things that you have dumped, dump them. That’s it. Give it away dump if you want a better meaning give them away so that some other individual will benefit from your stuff. Otherwise, dump it. Don’t worry about it.

Now you can delegate it. Many, many years ago, I read the book, Getting Things Done by David Allen, I talk about that book here on this podcast. I got this formula from it from that book from him, says Ford organize yourself either, you know, dump it, delegate it, defer it or do it, the chances are you’re deferring it, and I did it. I was deferring for a long amount of time. Hence it was piling up. But then you cannot get to a point where you start doing things. Unless you do the first two things, which are to delegate or to dump. And my primary suggestion, my number one suggestion to you is to dump everything dumped everything, and start clean. Don’t worry about what you have done or what you’ve not done, because the chances are, you know, even if you get to them, there’s a cost involved with this. You can’t I mean, I have like seven years of my life gone into the stress of what I was not there for anyone during the seven years not for my family, not for they’re worried constantly for taxes. What about the papers, worried about the books, all gone? distractions, the reason why you can’t get things done is that you’re distracted.

The stuff that you have distracts you. But then there is a new element. There is this new AI that is distracting you these new machines, this these machines, this AI all those things. It’s called the show up in different shapes and forms Facebook, Netflix, YouTube, and this podcast, are distracting you and taking over your mind. You don’t have anything left to apply yourself to. Of course, there are other people and all but then most of the gadgets and the apps and these gadgets the killing you So, if you stop your distractions, you’ll get back something. But if you organize yourself, you’ll get everything back. And that is the message I wanted to drive here on the podcast today. So go start dumping, start delegating, you got to hire the right people, and all that it takes is time, but dumping is your internal game. That’s something that you have control over. Delegating, you don’t have control over. So if you’re sitting there and thinking that one day you will find somebody is going to come in and go to take care of all your papers and all the stuff in your house. Not happen unless you hire someone. Yeah, I did. I did hire somebody. Eventually, when I was struggling with this, I did pay somebody, I don’t know five or $10,000 to come in every day and clean up stuff for me. I did not necessary in this equation, not necessarily take some accountability and get the ball rolling. So you know, one of the things, when I start working when I was working with people one on one, one of my requirements, was that they are organized. If not, there’s no success. You can’t enjoy success. You may create can enjoy, what’s the point? Okay, that’s all for now, wherever you are, be safe.

Start your Monday with this notion to organize and get more focused by eliminating all distractions and start your day with the commitment and I will be here with you tomorrow. And we’ll talk a little bit more and in a little bit different manner.

Growth Comes From Consistent Effort, Not Luck

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It’s a Monday morning, and as I’m recording today’s podcast, welcome back to success with Srini, I have a very special message for you. If you have a mindset of securing all the gold in one shot, if that’s who you are, then today’s podcast episode is for you. I’ll tell you in a second what I mean by securing all the gold, the kind of profession I’m in, I get to talk to a lot of people, I get to hear people’s mindsets, I get to hear people’s problems. Also, I get to hear about the challenges and setbacks. That is my pool, that is my draw.

So people share their issues with me. But also get to hear as a part of that, how they think, you know, what is leading them. And, I not only hear people’s pain and suffering, but I also hear people’s shortcuts. If I do this, if I do this, then I’ll get there. And I, you know, as a coach, I am here on this podcast and radio shows and seminars, and all I’m telling people listen, there is no shortcut to any place worth going. No shortcuts, try to lose weight, 10 pounds in 10 days, you can’t do it. Even if you can do it is not healthy, want to make a million dollars overnight, you can’t do it. And there are programs, there are people who sell you into that and I seem credible. I mean, it’s just so funny people fall into it. Matrix eight Casino. In fact, forget about that for a second, I’ll come back to that. My first job in America was a very real job. Like when I got a paycheck, a W two a 401 K, and all that was for a gambling company called Silicon gaming, I used to work there, and back in 96. And when I’m early jobs, I would go to Las Vegas to spend time, you know, working with people that the installations of the slot machines and all that. And we used to make slot machines. And very early I got to get the gambling mindset. So even though I saw that in India, this was very distinct very different in Vegas. Now, years later, as a coach doing what I do, I go to Casino M8trix because sometimes I go to some events that happen there. Some celebrities come and things like that. And I go there I see the floors. I see people there. They want to undo all the pain, suffering, struggles, the challenges in one shot, just one shot. I want to undo everything and the belief in it.

Growing up, I was told the story of a guy who’s a farmer and a golden egg. The story goes like this farmer wakes up, goes to his backyard finds a goose with the golden egg collects it sells it makes money becomes rich, golden egg. On the second day, the same thing happens. One more egg, golden egg. On the third day, one more golden egg. So the farmer sees a pattern. The goose is given one golden egg a day. And he’s becoming richer. Greed kicks in greed. He says okay if I’m getting one golden egg a day, what if I opened up the stomach, and I collect all the golden eggs at once. So he opens up his stomach thinking that he’s going to get all the golden eggs. Well, obviously, he calls the gurus. And he finds nothing. The story back in the day didn’t make any sense to me. Because I was young, small.

But today, I see this story playing out everywhere. I talk to people that like I’m investing into this business, I’m going to make all the money. This is the only last few dollars I have and I’m going to crack it. This is the best time for me to buy the stock. Hence I’m putting all that I have, which I do not have a lot though, into this one stock. I want to make it. I’m shorting the stock. I’m making a poor time making a call. I hear this. I listen to this all the time. And I’m thinking you see growth any growth is daily. Every day you have to suffer to grow every day. You have to have an element of fear, an element of frustration, an element of pay In an element of seclusion isolation, one element every day you have to experience.

So, as a part of daily, you have to experience success, failure, some lost opportunities, some change, and some heartbreak every day. And there is no way to accelerate this. Yes, there are some strategies, some ideas, some techniques, and things that will minimize the pain, and the suffering, and gives you a path of comfort. But there is no way to accelerate success. We are not talking about accelerating success, we are talking about getting on a path that leads to success, you’re talking about the journey, we’re not talking about destinations. See, thinking that anything can be attained in one single attempt, one shot is deceptive. And for sure, is that a SciPy, for failure? So if you want to make a lot of money, all you have to do is start now, put a little bit, you’re bankrupt right now, just put a little bit of money every day, you’re making some money, you’re making some money from somehow somewhere, right? Just put some money, maybe $1 A day into an investment. You’re making a good amount of money, decide, you know, 10 15% of your money going into an investment. Every day, don’t think about investments. See, if you buy some stock, some mutual funds, whatever, and I’m not an expert, I don’t claim I don’t have any certification in those areas. And obviously, I’m not qualified to tell you which stock or which mutual fund. But academically speaking, if you invest, and you do that over a long period of time, then it’s it grows. I was just listening to a story the other day, where this lady became, you know, super rich because her grandmother invested in a stock that we all now know as Coca-Cola many, many years ago, 40, 50, 60 years ago, bought a few shares in Coca Cola and never sold and that kept on moving from, you know, her to her next generation. And finally, to now the third generation. It’s amazing. It’s funny, it’s just to think about it. So you want to lose weight, and go exercise workout, right? And you do that every day. You don’t do that once you do it every day. If you want to improve a relationship that you know is not going right, do it every day.

Somebody texted and emailed me the other day. That was a while ago, though, not the other day a while ago, saying I heard your podcast and you said, always do one thing. The entire day, just do one thing. No, I never said just do one thing. I say do as many things as you can. But understand that if you do one thing, right? Then your success is going to be guaranteed. But that one thing has to happen consistently over a long period of time. And that principle applies everywhere. So whatever you’re trying to do right now, do it daily, do it consistently. And she gives it some time, maybe a month, or two or three or four, and sees your life change. And then as you’re doing you need support, you need some strategies. Yes. It’s very easy to accelerate something that has momentum. If something doesn’t have momentum, it’s very hard. You can bring in the best trainers, best coaches, and best mentors, and you can’t pour life into a dead body. But if the body is already in motion, it’s easy to accelerate. But accelerating something doesn’t mean that you are going to get there faster. But you may get there with less effort. I hope it’s coming across I hope I’m making this concept clear. So walk away from this securing the gold in one shot doesn’t exist, never existed. And if I would have known this principle early in life, even though the story was told to me very early in life, I never got the gist of it. It’s funny how parents reach out to me asking me, you know, what can we tell our children so that they can succeed early in life? Listen, everybody is going to make mistakes. Every kid is going to make mistakes. There is no way you may as a parent, you may stop them from making the mistakes that you made in your time, but then those mistakes are not relevant to your children in these times, so they are going to make mistakes that are appropriate to them.

In these times, they will make their mistakes, they have to learn from their mistakes. Very rarely do I come across people who learn from somebody else’s mistakes. In fact, one of my goals for this podcast was to tell people so that they can learn from my mistakes, but most people don’t. It’s funny how that works. But that’s how the world works. So every generation is going to make mistakes, and every individual will make mistakes. And we all learn from our own mistakes, hopefully, hopefully, we’ll do some people don’t some people keep on repeating the same mistakes, which is very interesting and funny I do myself do I repeat, there is a layer of my mistakes that I keep repeating over and over again, I know I’m repeating them, but some unconscious thing going on there. But I do. And here I am coming here and telling people not to repeat their mistakes.

The reason why I say that is because I have successfully stopped making or repeating mistakes in some areas of my life. And that qualifies me to kind of give me the voice to speak here. But then there are some areas that I’m still repeating myself. Hopefully, eventually, I will overcome those. So no single shot to secure all the gold. You want the gold got to secure a daily growth demands daily grind. Hey, that’s all on the podcast, wherever you are, be safe. And you have a wonderful wrap-up with your Sunday. And I’ll see you here. Well, I’ll talk to you or maybe I’ll talk with you as early as tomorrow, right here. A new day. start of a new week. Stay tuned.