How to Erase a Memory with Hypnosis

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Welcome back. Today on the podcast, I’m answering a question again, from a listener of this podcast, who messaged me two questions. I answered the first question yesterday. And today I’m answering the second question. And the question goes like this Srini, I heard you talk about memory, and how hypnosis can be used to remove an old memory. But then I also saw a video on YouTube, about you talking about your mother and how you are not able to help her remove an old memory. What is the truth? I see other people’s also saying that memory can be removed, you are saying a memory cannot be removed. Okay, so this video that he’s referring to is at a live event that I did nearly three years ago, where I talked about how my mother at a very late stage in Stage Four with stage four lung cancer, going through chemo asked me about this question. She said You’re doing this hypnosis stuff. Is it possible that you can erase memories? I said it’s possible. But then the kind of request you have is not possible, because I knew what she was going through. She says I want to live for one day. Without those memories. I said I cannot do it. It’s not possible.

Now, I did tell her that it’s possible at the same time, I said, it’s not possible. So let me explain this, and why some people do claim it’s possible. And why is it possible also, sometimes, according to me, and why in this specific case, I said, it’s not possible to my mother? So here is how this works. Our memories are not exactly the same way when we created them. With time, a long time, memories fade. And by fading, what I mean is that there are some elements of that memory, they just go away. So we retain the overall memory structure, we can always go back and kind of mention that memory or recall that memory. But with time, there are several elements of the memory that we cannot recall, at the same level we experienced on day one. So memories get fragmented over time. And the brain has a challenge, putting together all these fragments and creating a clear picture over and over again, in due course of time, it’s very hard for the mind for the brain. So my mother was asking me to completely substitute the memories, which is not possible. It’s very hard, and cannot be done. But you can alter memory. So if there is a memory that is bothering you, for a long time, and somehow you’re not able to move forward. And you feel that is the only single biggest thing that’s stopping you want the only obstacle you’re dealing with, then you want to change it. So it’s possible that you can go to a Hypnotherapist. And in the state of hypnosis, it’s possible that the therapist can find these fragments that are not clear to you, you have the overall memory, but then there are fragments that are not clear to each individual the small little fragment can be altered in a way that the overall memory can be desensitized.

So, every time you have to recall that memory or the memory comes in on its own, at least you have now desensitized the effect of that memory because these fragments have been redone in a positive way provided it’s done through proper therapy and provided that you have given the consent to the therapist to do that. So yes, you can alter memory but you cannot completely alter it you cannot substitute it okay? So some components of the memory can be recreated in a positive way, but the overall structure and overall footprint of the memory cannot be changed. And again, this process involves that you work with the therapist with consent for a considerable amount of time to get that result but can be done has been done. I’ve done it so just to let you know. So that was my point and appreciate you watching the video. Appreciate you.

I don’t think I published this song on YouTube, but I don’t know where you where you saw this video maybe via my email not sure. Because before even responding to this question, I did check on YouTube. I didn’t find it. So maybe you got it? No idea. No idea is very difficult. I don’t know where you saw it. But that’s all hopefully answered your question. But yes, you should try if any of you, anybody who’s listened to this podcast episode, if you ever are thinking of, or you feel that some memories are holding or binding you to certain kinds of feelings that you are not able to break through, then yes, try hypnosis. Give it a chance. Okay, that’s all for now. Wherever you are, be safe. And hopefully, this is helpful, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Post Covid: How to Balance Work and Life

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I got two questions from the listener of this podcast, one asking me about work-life balance. And the second question is about memory. So I’m going to address the first question today on the podcast here. For the second question, I’m going to take it up maybe tomorrow or the day after, depending upon how it goes. So the first question is, I’m back at work. And for the last two years, I had been working from home. And now I have difficulty balancing the demands of home and work. Do you have any advice for this? Yes, I do. I have done numerous podcast episodes, speaking about work-life balance, specifically, during the COVID. Time. And also, on my radio show, during the COVID times, I spoke a lot about how things are going to change and how things would be different. Most of the things that I predicted, for lack of a better word predicted, I think all came true. But if you haven’t listened to those radio shows, and you have not heard the podcasts from 2020, and 2021, you may not relate to exactly what I’m referring to. But if you are, or if you did listen, then you know exactly what I’m saying. So let’s get into the work-life balance imbalance question here.

See, there is a pattern that has evolved, and the more people I talk to, the more people I interact with, I’m seeing this. And other experts are also now saying this 200 publications that are getting numerous articles on this topic. And there is some level of trauma that all of us as humanity we developed, coming out of COVID. And trauma has two main elements to it. One is a fear of survival, which we clearly saw in this case. And we also saw social isolation. These are the two primary components. In the context of trauma, of course, there are many more. And because we went through as humanity went through for a long time, we will what nearly 24 months of fear of survival, social isolation, and everything we have now developed. And all of us, including me, of us, have developed post-COVID Stress Disorder. Okay, so it’s called PCSD. And, and PTSD is posted trauma, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, I can’t even say it, that is a whole different thing altogether. But every time there is the discussion of, hey, my life has not come back to the same level that I used to have before COVID.

I’m having difficulty coping with the requirements of life. Now that I’ve gone through staying at home, during COVID. This is life, in general, was that you stay home and you go to work. And there were clear boundaries, those boundaries got compromised during COVID. So now the boundaries are removed, you really do not know whether you’re working or you’re sleeping, or you’re eating, you’re doing all of them at the same time. And you’re doing nothing at a time when one of those things was supposed to be done. So you don’t have control over your sleep, you don’t have control over your food, your diet, you don’t have control over your time. And you don’t have control over other people, because everybody can step in into your time and demand that certain things need to be done. So you now have to cater to them. And you’re not really catering to the most important one, which is your work, which is your home, your time also became a little bit questionable. So at home, you’re not responding to messages from people, which means people are thinking you’re working at home. At home, you’re not responding to the requests of people at home. That means you are busy doing some work.

Now, neither of these two is correct. So at nine o’clock in the night, if your spouse is asking you to do something and you’re saying I’m busy working, or you’re not responding at all, then they might be thinking okay, you know, you’re doing something that is not really directly impacting the home. So time, your integrity dealing with time has become a question mark also through this process. How do you deal with this? And I think this question is, even though I didn’t want to answer it this way, but you see where I’m going with this. So clearly the separation is not there. So my suggestion to you is that you separate work from home. Now, some of my friends are telling me this, that they’re not being required to go to work every day. So you show up once a week, maybe twice a week, it’s okay.

Now when that kind of situation comes up, you need to precisely mark your calendar saying that on Monday from 2 pm to 6 pm, or 9 am, to 5 pm, I’m going to be at work. And I’m going to do that on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays. So whatever. Other days, I won’t be. And I will stay home, and work from home. So you make that very clear in your mind where you want to be at a given point in time, on a given day, in a given week. Very simple. Otherwise, hear people telling me, I was supposed to go to work, I got caught up at home, and now I neither can go to work nor stay home. The second thing I would try is to delegate everything, maybe you got used to taking on a lot of things on yourself, you got to start delegating, you need to keep asking and telling people listen, I can’t do this, I can’t do that. No, can you take over these things, this makes sense for you to do work on this, this makes you know me not to work on this, right you position your kids, you start asking? Now, one other thing also is you got to rediscover your confidence. This is not about managing time or managing boundaries, of course, those things have to happen. But you got to bring back your confidence about who you are, why you are in this role, whatever role you are playing, and what’s your commitment, what’s the outlook of what, as a group, as a department, or as a company that you are doing. So you need to kind of bring back your alignment into the overall context of everything that you’re doing. If that is not done very quickly, then it’s going to create more similar feelings within you the feeling with which you texted me. So this ambiguity will continue and you may not be able to break through. And you don’t want your job to become like a paycheck, and exercise for a paycheck. And the beauty of all this is you are here to explore yourself, you want to expand yourself you want to grow. And everything else should happen as a result of your pursuit of these things.

Rather, you simply pursuing a paycheck and trying to juggle a few things here and there. It’s not good in the overall context. So I want you to find your confidence back as soon as possible. And there are different ways you can do it. And, you know, this podcast and many other areas where there is a ton of information, a ton of knowledge, strategies, techniques, all that available for you if you really want to, but unless you don’t get back at confidence, it’s very difficult for you to achieve something. And I think that question is more about achievement anyway, I think you’re not achieving at a level that you were achieving before. And once you take your mind when you’re not achieving something or you start to believe that you’re not achieving, you start looking into what are the things that are different. What is different about me now that was not there back in the day, and then you’ll start comparing and contrasting and then you will somehow find some fault and then you will justify your outcomes aiming to that fault because now you can’t fix that fault. So get back to confidence. Do these changes, start drawing some lines of physically separate yourself go to work, commit to those timelines, you know, set some goals in between also, and then you’ll start seeing just a matter of few days, in this mind is an interesting thing. You know, if you keep doing something repeatedly for a few days, magically, it fills itself up. So it starts to believe it’s new found reality. So your mind will start bending and you’ll start to enjoy yourself.

Hopefully answered your question. Hopefully, this is helpful. If it is let me know. And I got a second question. I’ll come back here. Maybe tomorrow, the day after answer your second question. Okay. That’s all for now. Wherever you are, be safe, and I’ll talk to you as early as tomorrow. Bye now.

The Truth About Getting Paid What You’re Worth

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Yesterday on the podcast, we talked about value creation. And towards the end, I said this value creation has to be somehow tied to income generation. So you created all this value. And if you can’t make, you can’t sell that value, you can’t make money, then you’re kind of missing out on one big element. So I said, I’m gonna talk about that tomorrow. So here we are today. Let’s talk about it. So has it ever happened to you that you went into a job interview, and they asked you how much money you want, and you said something, and they ended up giving you the money? And you will later realize that you undersold yourself. This happened to me many, many years ago. And this happens today. Then when I work with people, I hear people telling me, I undersold myself, I should have asked this and this and this, and that all, so happened to me, this is my first experience. This was back in the late 90s. I was making about $42,000 a year, and it was bad. And I wanted to make more money. So I go to a job interview, and I clear the interview. And the manager asks me, you know, how much money do you want a nice summary of $1,000? And he says, yes, come back tomorrow, your offer letter will be ready. I was surprised that, you know, they didn’t say anything else.

So naive, ask somebody tells them, they just give somebody 1000. And I came home very happy. And I was with a bunch of roommates back then I told them, all of them said, you know, I got the jobs $100,000 all that. And three, or four months into the job. Three or four months, six months into the job. My boss came by one day and said, listen, thank you for your service, you have been incredible. And you know, I was struggling to hire someone, and you came in. And if you would have said $140,000, I would have given you that money. Because I was desperate to hire someone. And now that you have stayed in this job for six months, you’re proven to be one of the best highest in my lifetime. I feel guilty every day that I under hired you. So immediately, I’m increasing your pay to 90,000. I can’t go beyond that. I’m sorry, you did not ask me for more. Back then if you would have said 140 Back then I would have just given you that money. And maybe more. I was shocked. And I was shocked. Because for the first time in my life, somebody told me that I undersold myself. It happens, but people don’t tell us. But this gentleman, this boss was so nice. He was and I said Wow. Okay, I went back into my thinking, why is that? years later? You know, years later, I look, I went back into my thinking and I said, Why did I say 70,000? What was the data point? What was I thinking?

Somebody 1000 from nowhere? Well, turns out that my roommate, or a gentleman in another apartment, the same group, got a job. And he asked for 70,000 He got it. And he was celebrating 70,000 with all of us. And I picked up from that celebration. If he made somebody 1000 He’s having the celebration, I should ask for 70,000 Next time when I go for a job interview. And I did. Because I don’t have any other data point to explain this. Okay, you get the idea. We undersell ourselves the question is how do we truly, first of all, we need to assess our own values. And our own value, specifically values, of course, but value. And the majority of the time we value who we are by looking at titles, by looking at the markets by looking at other people how much they’re making, and all that. So of course, as I said yesterday on the podcast qualification experience, skills, all that play a role. We want to keep acquiring skills and experience and all that and we amplify that in our resumes and in our profiles and all that. But then sometimes it’s difficult to change the perception of people with whom we work. So if you’re working the same job for eight or nine years, and you have along the way, you have accumulated a lot of experience a lot of certifications qualifications, but you go back and you say, you know, I have all this now, can I get some more money and the chances are, you will be denied. And the reason why you are denied is not that they are at fault or you are at fault. It’s just that it’s very difficult to change the frame through which you see a picture very hard.

I’ll give you an example. You can get all the qualifications, all the certifications, all that fitness certifications. You might have won Mr. Olympia for 2030 times impossible. But you get the idea, you get all the certifications within the weight loss space, fitness space, and all that. But when you are compared between you, and somebody who is a fitness expert to the stores or to the celebrities, if a fitness expert to the celebrities comes in, and does a Bootcamp or a program or sells you something, you will end up buying that, or people will end up buying that, despite of you being a certified instructor, with all the qualifications all the experience, you will be paid by the hour, but they will be paid by their statute. Interesting how the world operates, though, if you think about it. So if you’re using qualifications, experience knowledge, you probably went to the best universities and got the best degrees, and you use that to sell yourself, the chances are there is a limit to it. And beyond the limit. It’s hard. So now the question becomes how do you shift the perception? How do you shift the frame through which people are seeing and most of the time what people do is they change their jobs, they go to a different job? But then it is the same, it repeats itself. And again, they fall into the same pattern, 234 years into the job, they’re struggling now to change the perception of the management, and now the money doesn’t go up, and all that. So one way they want to change the perception is by changing the position, which works temporarily, but doesn’t work perpetually. What can you do to perpetually change this? Well, the first and foremost thing is that you need to know what you’re doing. You need to like what you’re doing. So knowing to like and do. So you really do. So you like what you do you know what you do? And you really do. I think that was Bill Rogers, who said that, when you talk about your topic, your subject, it should sound like it’s coming from a place where it matters to you more than the other individual.

So if I’m presenting here, I’m speaking here, I’m doing this podcast, everything I say here matters to me more than it should matter to you. If not, you will tune out you will, I can’t create this connection. And at that point, once that connection is intact, or is in place, it doesn’t matter whether I sound odd, or I mess up my words, and I don’t present properly. I don’t speak properly, it doesn’t matter. But that connection has to be in place. So it has to matter to me before it matters to you. So how can you create value? differently? Now let’s, that’s the first part is to like and know. And that’s the most important part. But beyond that, what can you do? Well, in my opinion, in my experience, in my observation, there are three reasons why people get paid top dollars. I get paid not because I’m a good coach. There are incredible coaches, there are incredible people who do incredible things. And I get paid whenever I get paid. Because I do one thing that is different that’s unique from others. And this is where I spend most of my time, I don’t go and spend time acquiring qualifications, certifications, and writing up saying I got certified from 40 different organizations, none. The differences? Here is why I know I get paid. The first reason is, that I get paid for creating certainty. I give you certainty. People are confused. People are cluttered people are lost. They are coming not because I have the greatest solution on Earth solutions are available everywhere. They come to me because I’m capable of providing a certain beauty to them. That which others are not so I’m always certainly focused. Okay. Then I also do one more thing. I remove indecision from people. And coaches and mentors do that all the time. Even salespeople do that all the time. I have a friend of mine who says I don’t want to sell I hate selling, but he’s a sales professional who hates selling.

I said you know why you get paid? Yeah, because they think that I’m a commission guy. That’s why you know, they don’t want to work with me and I don’t want to work with them because they don’t really value who I am. I keep telling him Listen, you’re not getting paid because you’re selling them you’re getting paid because you are helping them break through their decisions. So you’re solving a problem for them. That is why you’re getting paid. So in my mind think that I get paid because I remove in decisions. I crave certainty. Okay, and then I also think that I get paid because I affirm people to opportunities. So try these three things. Okay. Try to remove its decision to instill certainty and affirm people to opportunities. When I say affirming people to opportunity, what I mean is, that I give them hope. I instill optimism. I tell them that I see what it takes in, I see what it takes. And I see you have what it takes. And I recognize that and all I want you to do is now start believing in yourself. Like any other coach does. But it’s simple.

Try these three things, and start looking at your resume from these three angles. Stop looking at your resume your profile from, oh, I have the qualification or the skill or the experience. Yeah, everybody has what’s unique about you. This is how, if you start looking, and there are many such things, by the way, I just highlighted three things. When you do this, you are now in a way, expanding your value and your qualification experience. All that it matters. You still have to present all that. But then all that now becomes unique, and it takes in the top of the stack. Not at the bottom. Hopefully, I can bet it. This is how you get paid more. Okay. That’s all for now. Wherever you are, be safe, and hopefully Today’s concept. I’m hoping that you opened some possibilities in your mind. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Stay tuned. Bye now.