Started A New Career But The Market Is Going Down. What Should I do?
Here is the complete transcript of the podcast
I am super excited about today’s podcast episode because I’m answering a question. And again, this question is on a topic that I live and love every day. I love and live every day. I think that’s the right way to say, Happy Monday morning to you welcome back to Success with Srini usually don’t have this kind of excitement on a Monday morning. But this question is so amazing.
Now, because I know this individual, remotely, somebody who I know, and this individual has become a listener of this podcast, as somebody who I know from my previous life, but for the sake of this podcast, let’s say let’s call him John Doe. So John, messages me, telling me, “Srini I have recently gotten into real estate about three months ago, this is my new career, and guess what, Murphy came by and the market is now going down. I don’t think I made the right decision, I invested nearly $20,000…” I have no idea how you invest $20,000 to become a real estate agent, no idea. “I’ve done one, one deal but now I’m thinking, I’m questioning myself, Should I continue on this path or should I give up or should I stop?” I just said give up. “Should I stop? What’s your suggestion?”
Okay, I’ll put my excitement aside, I want to become a little serious with the answer. You see, here’s the problem. I’ve seen this multiple times, multiple times in the last few years. In fact, last five, or six years, I’ve seen people do this. They have full-time careers, they have good income going on. But they wanted to get into real estate because that’s where the transactions are happening. That’s where the money was flowing. And the mindset there is I want to make something out of everything that’s happening. That’s the mindset. Right? So a lot of tech jobs, why don’t I change my career, take some training and become a techie. Oh, a lot of houses being bought and sold? Why don’t I change my career, and take training to become an agent? See nothing wrong with that mindset. And you should always look for an opportunity. And that is the optimistic mindset, which is okay, nothing wrong, because we live in a capitalist world, in a capitalist economy, right? So capitalistic world, nothing wrong with it. But there is something wrong with it and the wrong is this. When you say career, that means career. The word career is synonymous with long-term success, success over a long period of time, that’s what a career means. And if that is true, that means you are in the game, to do everything for something, rather than something from everything. So you have to do everything for something spoke about long-term success for a second, there are a few ingredients for long-term success.
The first and foremost is knowledge. You got to build knowledge. And you need to learn, you need to occupy you need to prepare, you need to position. And I’ve done multiple podcasts on this topic. In the last fact that listens best to knowledge number one, number two is passion. Imagine doing something for which you are not passionate about Imagine me showing up on this podcast, not passionate about what I’m doing for the sake of doing. I mean how many times I’ve seen people, you’d be amazed. I’m a mist, okay, that people give up to do something. They’re not passionate about the dude for some odd reason. God knows what that is. And they look for the first excuse to quit and quit belief. So why even do it? Why even blame anyone for anything and all that? So you don’t have passion and doing what you’re doing today? I promise you you’re going to live a miserable life. I’m sorry, but you will live a miserable life. The third element of long-term success is how resilient you are. What all can you take on you? How committed and determined you are on this path. See, if you lack these three things, you can’t call it a career. Because you’ll be in and out. You’ll be in and out. Like the in an outline. You’ll wait till you get your burger but you’re out. Okay, you get the idea now.
So there are three things that are proven. These are the cardinal rules of a job or career, which is the first one is that you need to know what you’re doing. And that goes back to my earlier point, which is knowledge. So you got acquired knowledge and this is a good time to acquire knowledge. So if you believe in real estate and you think that real estate is the way is the future Ron, and I have said this multiple times, there are only two things in Silicon Valley, either you are in real estate, or you are in tech. And those are the two highest paying, or highest growing or highest. If anything changes in the world in a positive way, these are the two things that are going to go up in value in worth. So you should be investing in these two things. So it makes sense. You got to believe in that premise, you need to believe in that thought that yes, if anything in the world changes positively, then these two professions inside Silicon Valley where John Doe is, by the way, John, we benefit from it, he asked to believe it. So if that is true, it makes sense to invest your time now John, and acquire the knowledge and pay the price, then, the second cardinal rule is that you got to like what you’re doing. If you’re in for money, you’ll be out. That’s the truth. If you’re in for money, you’re gonna quit, people quit jobs because they’re in for money, they’re not happy. They can’t just they don’t have fulfillment, they don’t have any, in all that is they’re looking for something inside of them trying to fulfill, but they react to money and to keep on moving from one place to the other without having that thing in them. And the last thing is belief. The third one is belief, right? So you need to know like, and believe what you’re doing.
Now, I apply this principle, at least with this podcast, okay. I think I know something that if I share with people, it’s going to help them. Okay, and I like doing this. So it should show up. It should show up. They’re not reading from any script. You know, this is all mean, and the mic, and the speaker on your site, hopefully, you’re listening to this. But here’s the truth majority of people do not even come here, like seven, or eight minutes into this podcast, they don’t even listen to it this far. But they will listen, they will listen to this far if I am from my side have done and I come across being authentic. So I cannot be authentic unless I like or love doing what I do. Very simple. And the last one is that I have the belief that anybody will listen to this. And who will never ever talk to me and will never ever meet me will still benefit from this? That’s the belief I have. So when I have these three things aligned, this could be a career. It’s not a career. But this could be my identity. This could be my profession, if I really take this and by the way, this principle applies to every profession, not specifically to John who is in real estate, but could be a doctor, you could be a chiropractor doesn’t matter you have, you could be running a retail store doesn’t matter who you are, what you do these principles apply.
Coming back to you as a starting out as a real estate agent for the very first time. The challenge is this, the challenges that you’ll be told to sell yourself. And the elements of selling yourself would involve, hey, trust me, I have integrity. I have the commitment necessary to sell your house or to get your house. I work with an incredible team and you do whatever you have, you have to say what you have to say because you’re starting out in that profession. You are a newbie, not much experience in that space. So you will these are the things and I see even experienced agents and brokers use this. And that’s not where the real success is. Success is when you sell the outcome, not selling yourself. So if I show up here and say, Hey, listen, I’ve been on the radio for 14 years, I’m doing this and doing that I’ve experienced the no harm, the certification that the skill. Nobody cares. And I don’t want you to get all that. But if I show up here and say, Listen, I understand the problem you’re dealing with. And I know, maybe I have a solution. First of all, let me understand what you’re going through, and let me see if I could help you or if I can help you. If I can let you know if not, it’s okay. Now if I take that approach in that profession, any profession, usually, it’s not difficult to sell. Not selling it sale happens automatically.
Right. So the majority of the people who are in real estate right now just got in the garden because there was they wanted to get something out of everything that’s happening and don’t drop off and I don’t want you to drop off. provided you’re passionate about this and you see a future in this. Which by the way is true because everything that goes down comes back up. So 10 years from now, it’s going to become today it’s not a seller’s market anymore. 10 years from now it’s gonna become a seller’s market. You get the idea. And I’ve been myself in a buyers market seller’s market I’ve seen you know, Multiple ups and downs in the market. So I’ve been around for a while, if not for a long while I have been around for a while, I’ve seen three different dips already. And that’s where this is all coming from. And that’s why I said, I’m excited about this because I love and I live this and I live this. So you got to transition yourself from selling yourself to selling the outcome. How do you do that? Well, I’m going to quickly share this, you need to acquire the knowledge you need to become passionate, obviously. But you need to find the knowledge and experience so that you can remove the indecisions that that those are happening in your prospects mind. So you’ll be paid. Indecision removal is important, but most people don’t do it. They think the selling, you’re not selling, you’re solving, the real selling, you’re solving. When you solve, you get paid, and you’re rewarded for the solution. But you’re selling, it’s inconsequential, because everybody’s selling, they’ll be taken out. When you’re solving, you’re also creating certain 18 people. You’re removing the decisions, you’re creating subnetting these are the two things I do on this podcast, or I try doing on this podcast, removing uncertainties from people’s minds whoever is listening to me is creating secondary and removing indecision. Not worrying about the sales not worrying about money, who cares? See, because you have passion you love doing what you do, money will flow it will find itself don’t get worried about it.
Okay, so this has gone long. And I want to stop here. I hope you got a listener of this podcast, you’re listening to this. Hopefully, you got some value out of this. John, if you’re listening to this, these are some of my thoughts. Right? I could be wrong. I could be right. I do not know. But you know, it just came out from the core of my heart. So if you found value in this, then do let me know if you’re watching this on YouTube. Just write a comment, write a review. Or if you’re listening to this on your podcasting app. This would be a place where you can write a comment and write a review and all that okay. That’s all, for now, you start your Monday in the biggest and greatest possible way. And I’m going to go start my Monday too. And I’m going to catch up with you tomorrow here. Okay. Thank you. Stay tuned. Bye now.
Stop Entertaining People Who Are Not Going Where You’re Going
Here is the complete transcript of the podcast
Do not take people along with you who are unwilling to go where you are going. Forget about taking it with you, do not even entertain people who are unwilling to go where you are going. By entity and I mean, do not even talk to them, do not share your emotions, do not even ideate with them, do not even have conversations with them, do not even think about them, then you are focused on going where you want to go. Why? Because they will drag you. Why? They will pull you down. Why? Because they just are parasites. Okay.
Welcome to success with Srini. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. See, this is the truth. And this is the truth, whether you like it or not, this is a lesson that was given to me very early on in my life. And all along, I did not take that lesson. And today when I’m very old, I reflect and I reflect upon these lessons. The beauty of all this is at least I have this podcast, I have a radio show, and I can share it with you hoping that this will help. And hoping that even though I could not apply this lesson very early on in life, maybe somebody, maybe you maybe somebody who’s listening to this podcast will apply this, you know, a hit is the challenge. We love people, we like people. And we have many people who have contributed to our success or towards who we became or who have we become. And when we see success, it’s very natural, that we reach out. And we want to see the same success in them. It’s very natural, as a brother and sister, as a wife, as a husband, you want as a friend, you want to see success, you want to share your success with them, you want to see them succeed. Challenges this challenges, we cannot control somebody else’s destiny. See, I’m a parent and have children, I can raise them, I can feed them, I can support them, I can guide them. But I cannot control the outcome. I cannot define destiny. It’s their destiny, it’s their game to play, it’s their price to pay, I can assist, I can’t score. Now, imagine this is me with my children. Now imagine my friends, my coworkers, my distant relatives, I cannot do anything.
Now, if you want to create changes in people, you have to control the outcomes can’t control. Even in my coaching, even my training programs, and workshops, I can share the same I’m sharing, I can infer I can take different data points, I can look into different ways of thinking, and kind of a simulator can kind of draw a conclusion, but I cannot control the outcome. As a coach, I cannot. Once the outcome is there, I can process it, and I can influence that certain things should not be done, or certain things should be done in a certain way. But the outcome is completely in the hands of the subject completely in the hands of the player, whoever is scoring, it’s in their hands, or in their feet, or in their mind. You get the idea. The challenge is this, the people who will love you don’t like a lot of people in your life right now. You love them because of who they are, but don’t like them. Because they don’t share the same values as you. They don’t have the same beliefs as you. Even in siblings, even in you know, core relationships. So can’t change people. We cannot nobody can change people. Yeah, we can influence the change, but we cannot control the change.
So the problem is this, I want you to imagine for a second that you are driving a bus, you’re a bus driver. Now you know exactly at what time you’re going to start where from the location where you want to start. And then you know where you’re going to go. And you know the duration, you know the path, you know the map. And you know, everything because you drive all the time. Now imagine passengers getting into the bus halfway. They decide to change their destination. They say I’m sorry, we are supposed to go somewhere else but we are we got on the bus. Now what now either they have to get down, you stopped the bus they get down. That means you’re stopping the bus that means you lose momentum as a bus driver you lost momentum, they lost their time loss momentum loss, and then they get down hoping you know they can get a bus or whatever it is to get to where they want to get to.
Now, there is a possibility that these people could influence you to change your destination. If they have the power. They could influence you. This is what happens with people who have some holes, but they’re not strong. So when you allow naysayers, when you allow people who don’t share the same destination with you into your life, they will change your goal, they will change your destination. And now you have no idea you’re a good man or a good woman. And you have all the ingredients with you. Your heart is in the right place, you have the skills, you have the talent, you have the know-how you have the knowledge, you have everything with you. But you are not able to get to the finish line happened to me multiple times.
So here is my point on today’s podcast, which is I have wanted to preserve your thinking, I want you to preserve your intent, and I want you to be very clear, and very obvious about the goals that you have set for yourself on the path that you are on right now, wherever you’re going with your money with your investments with your carrier with the job relationships, I wanted to be very clear, if you allow people to talk into you, who do not share the same values and beliefs and the same expectations, then in a way you are allowing them to modify your destination, and your goals will be compromised. Now once you compromise your goals, you will compromise your time. And maybe you come back and redo these things. Maybe you’ll evolve at some point in time. But your last time, time is precious. So be careful. Spot all the naysayers. Don’t talk to them. Don’t even entertain them in your thoughts. In your dreams. Forget about in person.
Okay, I hope you don’t take this personally. But this is a podcast and I’m a coach and I show up as a coach and I want to drive some ideas and thoughts that have helped me and my several other people who invested in me to help them create results. Hopefully, this is helpful. If it is and you’re watching this on YouTube, or on my channel or you’re listening to this as a podcast. Either way, this should be a place for you to write a comment and if you think this will help somebody else by all means please share it. Please like the video like the audio, all that good stuff. That’s all for now. And I will catch up with you tomorrow. Stay tuned. Oh, one more thing I forgot to add. Listen, you’re here to have an exceptional life. So be careful with mediocrity, mediocre people will make you mediocre. Okay, got to go.
I Do Everything But My Parents Give Credit To My Brother.. Why?
Here is the complete transcript of the podcast
Today’s podcast episode is going to be a little different little unique in the sense that as somebody’s dealing with people’s problems, and somebody’s doing it for a long amount of time, sometimes it crosses my mind that, yeah, I’ve seen it all. It’s kind of an ego position. I’ve seen it all. Yeah, you know, human problems, are more or less identical. And yeah, if you stay in any profession for a long amount of time, you pretty much know it all. And right, when I’m about to make that conclusion, in my mind, I have encountered events and situations that have completely stopped me and challenged me to think differently. And this recent consultation with this individual is something like that. So I want to share the backstory, I want to share this because there are chances that you are in this, or maybe somebody who you know, is in this, and I’m sure this will help.
So this is the story of two brothers and one mother. And the younger brother reached out to me with a unique situation that he’s going through in his 40s. And he had a situation where he thinks that he does a lot for his parents, both his mom and dad. And for some reason, the mother supports the elder brother. In every conversation, in every discussion, the elder brother gets the credit. And the elder brother’s wife gets the credit. And despite him and his wife, taking care of both the parents, Mom and Dad, and the moment that lives with the younger brother, this individual, the younger brother, who reached out to me was emotionally very down and really beaten up because this has been going on for a long amount of time.
Now, every time a family conflict happens like this, the problems kind of go a step down, and he’s concerned about reaching out because his children now are also resenting this behavior. So I was speaking to him. And midway in the conversation, I said, Is it okay, if I talk to your parents, because I was at that point, he was calling in with his personal problem. But then he didn’t even say that to me. And he started saying that he is down. And he is having fights with his family. And that our disagreements, and as I started going, questioning him deeper, at some point, he revealed that one of the causes is the lack of attribution from the mom towards everything that as a family he does, or the white as a couple they do for her. And instead, she attributes everything to the elder brother and his wife. I hope you get the scenario now. When this came up, I said, I’m going to talk to the mom to the parents, which I did. So typical, let me give you a brief understanding of why this happens, why there is this conflict, the sibling conflict, where you see we call the sibling resentment, when, you know, one resents the other. It happens primarily because of the parenting styles, and also because the parents did not do the conflict resolution properly between the siblings. And the parents lack conflict resolution skills. And the parents have raised the children through a certain cultural, heavyweight. So in that culture, that’s how children are raised. So they don’t really, you know, it’s by default, it just happened that way. Because the conflicts were never resolved. And the individual treatments are different, or each kid was treated individually differently. There is no fairness because there is no fairness. One of the siblings, usually complains, and then it seems the other gets the benefit. Usually, that’s how this plays out. That was my thinking. Maybe that has happened. So when I got on a call with the parents, it took a while for me for them to open up because it was odd something like this happening without their knowledge. So allowed the son to prepare them. And then I got on a call with them. Now on the call, I found out something that I was not aware of.
First of all, I got them to an agreement frame that listens to your son’s feelings this way. Is it true? Interestingly, the mom said, Yes, I understand. And I understand why he is resenting. And he occasionally is angry at me. And I see that anger. But Srini, this anger, I can take. But I cannot overcome the pain and the suffering My elder son went through many, many years ago, so I’m trying to compensate for that along the way, as I’m trying to compensate for that it’s okay for me to take the Sanger. And I was totally shocked by her answer. And here is how she explained this. And this is a very important part, I want you to listen to this, because, again, as I said, maybe somebody who you know, might be going through this, and if it is this going to help, if not, I understand. years ago, Srini, I was I had trouble in my relationships. And as I was having disagreements with my husband, and I was taking a lot that was being put over me by his family, I did not give enough attention to my eldest son, he was growing up. And because of that, he was trying to solve the conflict between me and my husband and the other family members. As a result of that, he was in tremendous pain, the younger one was very young. As we were trying to resolve this, I ignored my son, my husband ignored my son. And he took a lot of beating, he took a lot of suffering. And eventually, when things started settling, in a way, if you asked me, we used our son, my eldest son, as a therapist, and today, 25 years later, 30 years later, we continue to do that. And the reason why I am too, you know, more compassionate towards him is that I want to undo everything that we did, unknowingly to him, when he was not supposed to be going through that. And we did a poor job by the kind of doing this in the open. So he took the beating because he was older. And today, the reason why I’m little, you know, compassionate towards him and his wife, obviously, my son, but my daughter-in-law, because I don’t want him to mimic or kind of take on everything that happened in our lives. And that getting spilled over into his personal life.
So if I keep them happy and treat them right, then maybe this won’t happen the same way. Whatever happened to me and to my husband, that won’t happen to him and his family. And when I do this, you know, I said, Listen, you understand the pattern here. But you’re trying to overcompensate for something that happened to you many years ago, in the process, you’re taking away that which is being done to you, even this is irrelevant, you need to come up with a balance. So at that point, I got the younger son on the call, and explained, fought this happen. And this is a pattern through which both the parents have lived a majority of their life and explained to the younger one that this pattern is not going to change, it’s very difficult to change the pattern and primarily, may involve a lot of intervention. And it’s very difficult to overnight change the association that the subconscious filiation in the mind of the parents towards the eldest son, primal, the mother towards the eldest son, it is very difficult to disassociate that affiliation. So one way to overcome that is to have an honest conversation between the three, we couldn’t get the eldest son on a call. But then the problem has to dissolve the eldest son’s side also, which is maybe the eldest son is taking advantage of these conversations and thinks that he has a bigger position in this now, in the relationship. Ideally, nobody has a bigger, better positioning in the relationship if everybody is struggling, and I was trying to convey to the elder son that the struggle also belongs to you, not only to the mom and the younger brother.
The reason why I’m sharing this today is that this is something that you might be going through, as I said, maybe somebody who you know might be going through. If it is, then I want you to do me a favor. Write a comment if you’re watching this on YouTube. If you are listening to this as a podcast, write a review. And if you resolve this problem in your life, how did you resolve it before without shutting yourself down, because this was something the younger brother told me. So I’m about to shut myself down, cut off everyone, and be done with all this. And but I thought I would reach out to you and talk to you because I’ve heard you talk about this on your radio shows. As of today, after, this was about four weeks ago, three weeks ago, as of today, they’re still together, they’re still talking. And they’re still in sync with each other. It takes time to kind of, you know, now that the conversation is in the public. It’s open, everybody’s talking.
So there is progress, but then it takes a while to heal. What did you do to overcome a challenge like this? Or do you know anybody who overcome it? Who did overcome this challenge or a similar channel like this? And what did they do? Share it because if you’re watching this on YouTube, there are other people who might be listening to this. And they may benefit from this also. And that’s all for now. Hopefully, today’s podcast episode is helpful. It’s a completely different story altogether, a different approach and different, you know, narrative that I was trying to present today, hoping that this helps. That’s all for now. Wherever you are, be safe, and I’ll catch up with you tomorrow. Stay tuned.