Success Is NOT Revenge

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Let’s start today’s podcast with a question. And the question is, how many times have you heard the saying, success is revenge? I have no idea who said it for the first time, but I’ve heard this multiple times as a kid. And then, later on, you know, as I started doing seminars, workshops, I’ve seen speakers say this. And that was my understanding for a long time. And knowing what I know, which is not a lot, by the way. But my today’s understanding is, that success is not revenge, forgiveness is revenge. And who said forgiveness is revenge. In fact, forgiveness is the best revenge for the client, an incredible software developer, musician, and later on an American, Buddhist himself. amazing, incredible. He lived a short life but an incredible life. He said, forgiveness, his best revenge. Last week, I did a podcast episode I said, that focuses on what matters the most. And prior to that, on a radio show, I talked about this, I said, in order to have a happy life, you need to forget, forgive, and forward yourself. And that was last week. And the podcast also talked about this. Forgiveness is the best revenge.

Now let’s understand what revenge is and how it works. See, somebody does something incorrect to us, by default, the human system wants to balance it out. And most of the time, we balance it out by seeking some kind of similar kind of impact. So if somebody hurts my responses, and my uninformed responses, I need to balance it out. So I want to hurt them. So once I heard them, it’s going to become equal, it balances itself out. Now, in any situation, you have two people, a victim, and a transgressor. Now, the victim upon getting the pain, or the suffering, wants to balance this, because the victim has been inflicted with the damage. And at that point, the victim does seek out or search for similar kinds of damage that they want to inflict on the transgressor. Well, instead of seeking to inflict, the suggestion here is we find forgiveness. You see, searching for something means or seeking something means that you’re not sure if it’s there or not, but you have to look for it. But when you are trying to find something, that means you know, it’s there. You know, when you go into a new city, you know, that whatever place you want to go is there in the city, but you really, you don’t know how to get there, but you’re not finding where it is. So that means forgiveness is a findable thing. And there’s no word called findable, but you get the point. So it’s there everywhere forgiveness is there. You don’t need to search for it, it’s within you. All you have to do is find it, it’s easy to find forgiveness than to search for similar or higher damage that you want to inflict.

The best definition of forgiveness that I read many, many years ago, was Forgiveness means to erase, to erase something to forego what is to to give up resentment to wipe the slate clean, to release from debt to cancel punishment, to personally accept the price of reconciliation to give up all claims on one who has hurt you and let go the emotional consequences of the tort. De Batiste said, one of the most lasting pleasures you can experience is the feeling that comes over you when you genuinely forgive an enemy. Whether he knows it or not. I have been put in numerous situations as a part of my hypnotherapy practice where people have come to me and said, You know, I’ve experienced some pain very early on in my life. And the transgressor who did inflict this pain on me is not around anymore. That happened to me 30, 40 years ago, but I still live with that pain. And I don’t know how to come out of this pain. And I tell them that I have to take them through at that point, I have to take them through a forgiveness sequence. And we do that in a state of hypnosis very effectively hypnosis is again, you can do it in any different, whatever way you want to approach it. And I’m not saying hypnosis is the only way to do it. But in hypnosis, we try to erase or diminish it a is an extreme word. But then we want to diminish the facts of that emotion as much as possible, and kind of give the brain a new way to look at the same event. You kind of desensitized that event in their mind. And all the things come into play, all this forgive, forgiveness does come into play. And we can’t do that because somebody is coming in and saying, I have this pain that means I want to inflict somehow, I want to take some revenge. I don’t know what, how. And as a therapist, now that they are not there, that individual who inflicted the pain is not there, then listen, they’re not there. Why not? We go through a forgiveness sequence. And forgive this enemy completely. They don’t know you did, they may never know. But you, your mind your heart, your soul know that you’re forgiven. And by doing that you now from this point on, will start living a happier life. Somewhat a fulfilled life.

Tomorrow, in part of tomorrow’s podcast, I’m going to take up the same topic. And I’m going to expand a little bit on why people have difficulty in removing themselves away from these parts. We call them ruminative thoughts where they have the thought they have this thought and the thought keeps on looping itself. And we’ll talk about that tomorrow because I don’t want to extend this to this podcast. But my message on today’s podcast for you is that I want you to start developing your own forgiveness sequence. Wherever as much as you can. Try applying forgiveness and see what it does to you. Do it for a short time, just as an experiment and see how amazing life becomes. That’s all for now. I’ll talk to you soon.

Elevate Yourself With The Power Of Gratitude

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Today on the podcast, I’m sharing some of my thoughts on how you can elevate your game. How you can take whatever you’re engaged in right now, to the next level, whatever that next level is for you. Again, today’s podcast is a bunch of thoughts that I have already expressed on this podcast across multiple other episodes in the past. So I’m taking all those thoughts, and I’m stitching them together to create today’s podcast episode, hopefully, this is going to stand out. Okay, so let’s get into this. So how do we elevate our game? See, in our game, we have us in your game, you have you. In my game, I have me, it starts with us. And then there are some people around us who depend on us on whom we depend, or with whom we work, or with whom we play. These people will relate to different degrees and in different dimensions. So we have others around us. And then there is an invisible force above us. Not within us about was, of course, and I’m referring to God if you believe in God, and if you don’t believe in God, then I’m referring to a higher power. I’m saying that because I’ve met all kinds of people I’ve met, and I’ve worked with people who absolutely believe in God, and they say everything is God. And then I met people and work with people who tell me there is no God. And I respect all. Let’s get into this. So we have you, we have others, and we have God, let’s take that as a baseline.

So there are some things that need to be done. At your level, what do you need to do? Well, you need to take care of your body. So you take care of your body by eating well, sleeping well, and exercising well. All that so you look your best. You think your best, you feel your best, you speak your best, and you do your best in whatever game that you are engaged in right now. So along the way, as you are doing that, and you accomplish that, by taking time to work, to do the work, whatever work you’re doing, you’re taking time to prepare or cook the food that you’re eating, you’re taking time to read whatever you’re reading, accumulating knowledge information, and you’re taking time to play whatever games you’re playing, you’re taking time to laugh, and all that read all that so so you’re doing you’re putting in the time. So you’re developing yourself, it starts with you. Right. So that’s the first part. The second part is you also do things to develop your soul. And part of that includes that certain negative qualities have to go away, there are certain negative attributes that we all have in some proportion within us that have to go away. For example, haste, waste, greed, self-centeredness, competition, personal ambition, all these things, they are there, they need to be addressed. And they need to be observed very carefully. When we do that, we dollar per character with a dollar bar, or being or self. So this is us, this is the individual in this equation. That is you, that’s me, we need to do it at our level. Nobody’s watching us, we do it in our own way. And whatever process you follow, it’s okay, as long as you’re aware that these things have to be addressed.

Now, once this is done, then we focus on others around us, who are the others? Well, we have other people in different dynamics, some inside the house, some outside of the house, some who we do not see at all, but they exist in our lives because they are there on social media, whatever. So the others have to be attracted, you know, dealt with or addressed or accommodated in the equation. Now, how do we do this? Well, in order for others to be in our lives, and for others to elevate us, the first and foremost thing is that we need to listen to them. And we need to be sincere in dealing with them. We need to be polite in engaging with them. Overall, we need to understand them. Now, all this leads to that we need to have a mindset of showing and developing interest in others. The mindset is that I’m interested in others. I’ll tell you something, I cannot do this podcast, or a seminar or a workshop, or a radio show, or any of those things, which I do, and I don’t do them at the highest level. I mean, there is there isn’t like, it’s not like, the 1000s and 1000s of people are just listening and coming to seminars and workshops. No, I do it at a very small level. And I understand that I don’t have use measures in my mind. But whatever small level I do, I, I cannot do it. If I don’t have an interest in people’s well being cannot be done. It’s impossible to do. It’s hard to wake up every day in the morning and do a podcast like this, thinking that people are going to give me something and people are going to, you know, I’m gonna get something from people, it’s impossible, it doesn’t work. And that’s why people don’t do this. It’s hard to do something with an expectation. You can do things if you fundamentally are interested in people. And that’s what separates people who are just doing it because it’s their profession. versus people are doing it because they want to be self-actualized in the work that they’re doing. I’m going to get into this in a separate episode, but you get the point. And I’ve seen people who are polite, sincere, the listen the speak nice to others. But then, at some point, they are not seeking common ground. I’ve seen people do that. So if part of all this is that you are also seeking common ground, you allow other people’s opinions, you allow other people’s ideas and thoughts, and you accommodate them while being polite, sincere, understanding, listening, and showing interest. When we do that, we elevate ourselves.

So we elevate ourselves by taking care of ourselves, mind-body motion, health, and all that. But then we also elevate ourselves when we elevate others. And now, the third entity in our life is this unknown power called God. You can call it God, we could call it the unknown power, higher power, whatever you want to say. Now, let’s take God because that’s the That’s what I said at the beginning. People say if you or I’ve heard people saying that if you pray God, then pray God, if you want something, or you want to feel good, or you want to feel humble, or you want to pray, God, let’s for a second, not worry about prayer and focus on to other things that will elevate us. Because if you don’t believe in God, let’s say then how would you pray? Well, interestingly, there are two other things you could do. If you don’t believe in God, which is that you serve. You elevate yourself by serving to serve someone. Doesn’t matter. Who, and people do it. I’ve seen people doing I’ve seen people telling me, I don’t believe in God. And yet I go serve. And why do you do that? Hold gives me a good feeling. It gives me a purpose. It gives me so well. Okay. Okay. I listen. You know, God, that second thing is remembering. Remembering. The first is serving, and the second is remembering.

Now, what do we remember, we remember that we have a finite time here. And our life is going to be done. And you heard me if you if you’re a regular listener of this podcast, I have multiple times have said this, that at any point in time, you already lived 50% of our time. At any point in time, you’re 20 years old. You already lived for two years, if 50% of your life. If you’re 50 years old, you already lived 30% of your life. 30% is gone because we do not know what’s tomorrow. We do not know nobody knows. That’s the beauty of life by the way. Because every moment is unknown. Imagine how boring life would be if everybody knew what they were doing everybody, everything was known. It’s boring. The beauty of life is it’s unknown. It’s unknown, regardless of how much you Whoever tells you what’s going to happen tomorrow, chances are, they’re wrong, they could be wrong. That’s what makes life beautiful. Nobody knows the future. None. Interesting. Even the most enlightened people, don’t know the future. Nostradamus doesn’t know the future. They know the future, he said, a few things few were correct for you, or if you are incorrect, you get it. But the beauty is that when we remember, may remind us the right word remind when we remind ourselves that we are small and that there is something else. There is so much in this universe and so much that we do not know we can’t even comprehend how many I mean, listen, the multiverse. How many universes are there? Nobody knows. I mean, there are some scriptures that talk about these things, scientifically, we’re starting to now understand that for sure there is more to this universe. And there is a probability that there there is more than one universe. And whatever visible universe that we already know, the universe is much more beyond than the visible universe, at least the way the light has reached, we have the telescopes up picked up, whatever.

So here’s the point, there’s more to this. So by simply reminding yourself that you are small, they are finite time here, in a way, you’re also attributing some level, some level of gratitude is also coming in, just attributing to the Creator, whoever that is in your belief system. And also think that when you have a higher power, and you believe in a higher power, in a way, you’re also having an accountability partner, with you invisible accountability partner, if you believe in God, God is the invisible accountability partner. And if you’re not, then the higher power itself is an accountability partner, somebody is watching you, you’re making the moves, couldn’t believe that somebody is watching you, somebody is giving you time, somebody’s is telling you, your time is gonna be done, but I’m watching what you’re doing. It’s amazing. Once you bring that kind of mindset, at what level you will elevate yourself, now you will do all the things that are right now you’ll engage in the right activities, you’ll do whatever right is for you. Now, and when you bring other people into your life, now you’re operating at a whole different level. It’s amazing. You see, the quality of our life goes up. If we lead our lives with gratitude, and what is gratitude, it’s a quality. You know, I talked about removing some negative qualities as a part of the development of the soul. Haste, waste, greed, self-centeredness, personal ambition, all that. This is quality. By the way, gratitude is the quality of being thankful. That means at any point in time, you are ready to show appreciation. And written something in kindness, something whatever it is in kindness, a smile a word. For example, thank you. It is an incredible word. Right? At any point in time, you’re giving it back with kindness. At any point in time, your persona, your personality is accommodating, pleasing, actually, the word gratitude comes from the Latin word and the meaning gratis and, and the meaning of the word gratis means pleasing. You have a pleasing personality, and that’s quality. So readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. That’s the definition. Again, want to stop here. This has gone too far.

Hopefully, today’s podcast is helpful to you. Hopefully, this gives you some ideas to practice these things. Again, numerous episodes I’ve done specifically talking about each one of the items that I have referred to here in today’s podcast, gratitude routines, how to take the body, the soul, the mind, multiple podcasts I’ve done, how to communicate with people how to use words effectively, multiple podcast episodes I’ve done and how to structure a prayer how to all that multiple podcasts. Yeah. So I’m going to stop here. Hopefully, this helps. If it is, you know, my ask is simple. Read the podcast, write a review, and share it with a friend or a family member. And that’s all that’s all. That’s the ask. I’ll be back here again tomorrow with another incredible Broadcast until such time wherever you are be safe and keep listening. Bye now.

How To Lower Stress Quickly & Easily

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Today on the podcast, I’m answering a question that has come in from a longtime listener of my radio show, and also a listener of the podcast. And they’re asking me about stress. The question specifically says Srini, how to quickly and easily lower stress levels? It’s a great question, in fact, a very thoughtful question. And I’ll tell you why this is thoughtful is because whoever has sent me this question, they have tried many things already. They are very knowledgeable, they are very informed. And they are leading a life in a very meaningful way. And I know them, so that’s why I’m saying this, and they have used the word lower because stress is something that cannot be eliminated, stress cannot be taken out of the system completely. And that is why they have very carefully used the word lower, because they know that’s what I stand for, I stand for lowering stress levels, I do not suggest that you can eliminate stress, you can reduce stress, you cannot eliminate stress, why? Because stress is a normal function of the human mind, the mind has to stress because it is taking in a lot of things. There are people who have eliminated stress, for that you need to get into a Delta State which means you have to be removed from the happenings of the society, you have to completely isolate yourself, some saints have done it. And some people have done it, I cannot say it cannot be done. But it’s very hard to exist. And function in society. At this time of our lives very hard to really get to a state where we can say we have completely taken the stress out of our system very hard. Now, historically, on this podcast, what I have done is I’ve shared some of my thoughts, which are not very unique, by the way, when it comes to stress because there is a lot of literature available, other people have spoken about it. But if you studied this whole thing, this world of stress, there are four things specifically you have to do.

First and foremost is you got to identify the source of stress where it is coming from, and you need to stop it at the source. So you eliminate the source, and the problem goes away. If you cannot do that, then you need to either limit taking stress in or you avoid taking stress, every time there is a stressful situation. Or if somebody’s going to give you stress you stay away from them or you stay away from those situations. So first is to identify the source and eliminate it or address it or limit and avoid it. And then you cannot do the first two things, then you go to the third one, which is you fill your body with endorphins. You go you exercise, you run more, you know do some activity that raises circulation the system, it brings in some endorphins, and people go for massages for this too. So the different ways to do it. Some people take medicines and all that, which is a whole different discussion in itself, which is beyond my understanding, you can do that then let’s say if that’s also not working, then you go do mind expansion exercises, which is meditating or yoga or hypnosis, all those things come in that space of mind expansion. And then obviously, as the result of that, and also beyond that, there are other things you can do which is lead a healthy lifestyle in terms of eating right, sleeping, right and all that. So these are some things that will address stress. But these things have to be done. This has to be done methodically as a part of our daily existence. And cumulatively all these things will definitely address stress, but they cannot eliminate stress. They can reduce the stress of these other things. Now, how can you easily lower stress levels? That is the question. So I want to share a metaphor, and I’m going to answer the question through a metaphor. So long time ago, I came up with a formula called EFS to talk about this in my seminar CFS. So imagine that you have a jar. Jar. You can fill anything into the jar. If I give you a jar and I tell you to fill something into it, what will you fill?

Well, a jar can hold water Any liquid any solid, anything? Now, let’s take the example of water. If you have a jar that you want to fill with water, would you fill the jar with bad water? You wouldn’t write, you would fill with water. Now, what if I tell you that I’m giving you a jar, and I want you to fill some water and go give this jar of water to somebody who is in the hospital fighting their life, they want to drink water, you have to give the water to them. What will you do? At this point, you will think a lot. And if you are a concerned individual, he would probably fill the jar with the right water, the best water you could get, because it’s going to help somebody who is struggling in the hospital who is sick in the hospital. So you’re going to fill the jar and then there is a high possibility you’re going to seal the jar also the right way. So that no impurities would get in. Right? logically thinking, that’s what anybody would do, I would do that, I would take the jar filled with the best water, I could, I would probably go and buy the water with the pH nine or a bow, something like that pH value nine or above and then fill it up and seal it and go and deliver the water. The same is true with the mind. So the mind is empty when you start the day. It has not booted itself early in the morning. The other day, I was making a point I said people wake up in the morning, stay there in the bed for an hour or two and keep thinking and playing and replaying all kinds of emotions, all kinds of events in the mind, getting worried getting anxious. You’re starting the day, it’s an empty mind. You fill the mind with the right thoughts and you seal it. That’s the most effective way to deal with stress. So you start the day with an empty mind. You fill it with the right thoughts, the right thoughts will create the right actions within you. And then you fill it all the way to the top there is no space to bring in anything else. And you seal it so that nothing else even creeps in. And you do that. But then this is mind, right? This is Mind. So an hour or two later, you become tired. It’s true that you don’t bring anything in. But then what if the body becomes tired? And you become exhausted? What do you do? Well, you open the jar, and you release everything. And then you put in some new thoughts. And then you seal the jar, and you move on with life. So where I’m going with this is every hour, you have to refresh your mind. So that’s why we take breaks every hour. So we can go out and walk to get some oxygen, getting oxygen into the bloodstream is a way of decreasing stress or reducing stress. So we do activities every hour, maybe for 10 or 15 minutes, things that will reduce the stress level some activities to take a walking ticket, you know, drink some water, and maybe have a small little hallway conversation or a break room conversation with a colleague with a friend. Something like that.

A long time ago, many, many years ago, back in 1998 2000 2002. During the timeframe, when I used to work in the corporate I was notoriously known for going from one meeting room to another meeting room, like one conference from another conference room, and waiting outside the conference room, lean with my back on the wall on the glass wall of the conference rooms and go into a deep trance. So what I was doing there was I was doing what’s called rapid hypnosis, but primarily to empty my you know, open the seal, empty, whatever I was having, and then fill with some good thoughts and good feelings and seal it and go into the meeting. And that’s from there. I came up with the seven-minute hypnosis sequences. It’s a very solid sequence that you run in your mind that we’ve completely brought you back to your core and aligned you to everything that you would like to do in the day and remove all other what we call infringing thoughts and emotions. Since that’s the sequence, but you get the idea now, then be done. This metaphor is very important that imagining a jar and protecting the contents inside the jar and emptying the jar at the appropriate time and filling it again with the right content. That’s the metaphor. I want you to listen to the metaphor, I want you to bring that metaphor into your own existence in whatever way you can, and apply it to your situation in whatever way you can. And that is how you lower your stress levels. Of course, you have to identify the source of the stress. Of course, you have to limit avoid or eliminate the stress levels as much as the sources of the stress as much as you can. Of course, you have to seek out some endorphins. Of course, you have to do some mind expansion exercises, if you can, of course, you have to eat and sleep right, all those things are true. But the sequence of emptying, filling, and sealing is also true. I’m going to stop here.

Hopefully, today’s podcast episode is helpful. Hopefully, I answered your question. That’s a big one. If I did, let me know. And I’ll be back tomorrow. So stay tuned.
Bye now.