Take Care Of Your “Mental-Self”

Here is the complete transcript of the podcast

Welcome, or welcome back to Success with Srini. Today on the podcast, I want to highlight a significant aspect of the life of our day to day existence, which we as evolved individuals who don’t really take that much care, which is the mental self of us, the mindsight of us, we are very concerned about the food that we eat, the way we look physically. So our bodies, we do take care of that. But our mind, we don’t. Even though we know that we need to keep ourselves active as we age, our mental faculties, diminish, they kind of fade away, we need to keep ourselves agile, we need to keep ourselves, our reflexes, very, very active and all that. But still, we don’t. Not only that, over the last 20, 30 years, there is a tremendous amount of evolution that has happened. When it comes down to the body aspect. You have pain, you have some dysfunction happening with your body, there are medications, and there are approaches to address them. But when it comes to the brain, we are still exploring what the human brain is. And we’re seeing a pattern that’s evolving, which is we see people are living 200 years, 115 years, 120 years, and overall life expectancy is going up. But then you have a long physical existence, but a very short mental existence. So by the time you’re 75, 80, you now have issues like dementia coming in, you have Alzheimer’s kicking in all kinds of brain diseases coming in, but then the body is strong.

So, my father, I’ll give you an example. My father had a stroke, a TIA transient ischemic attack is what they call it. He got that when he was 75 years old, today, 79 years old today. He’s 88. And he has lived, when he got that stroke, as a result of the stroke, he ended up losing a part of his memory and some functions of the brain. But then overall, he recovered, but then he had a strong body at the time he got the stroke. So physically, he was looking amazing. But then the stroke happened and along the way over the years, you know, dementia started taking him, and other dysfunctional started developing. But then, for the last eight, nine years, now, he’s living a very compromised life.

So imagine a situation within which you have a long life, but then you are caged, because of a stroke, not because of dementia, because of some Alzheimer’s or epilepsy or something like that, Parkinson’s, so many diseases. So what can be done it, first of all, I want to establish a problem statement, I want to convey the problem statement before I get into what I think that we all should do. And there is a lot of research on this. And there are a lot of different philosophies, so much different literature available on how to keep the brain active. So I’m not going to get into all the minute things, but I’m going to share an overall approach that I think that we all should take. And I take this because I take this, that’s why the first and the foremost sisters, in order to keep the brain active, you got to be engaged in an activity within which you find happiness. Whatever the activity is, the job that you’re doing, the business that you are running, or a hobby or a passion that you are pursuing, all of that you should be happy doing. That means you are deriving some pleasure on a daily basis. You want to extend that derive some pleasure on an hourly basis, do it, but at least on a daily basis, starts from there.

Now, it doesn’t have to be a work or a business or a hobby situation. Let’s say you’re working very hard in a job within which you’re not finding happiness, then why not watch a movie? Why not take a walk? Why don’t we’ll make some friends, whatever that is, you need to create some happiness consistently to keep the mind active. That’s the point. Then we now also know that if you laugh, and you engage in watching funny movies and that have some comic elements to it, or you are laughing with a bunch of friends on having some discussions, whatever they tend to laughter tend to give the necessary dopamine effects to the brain. I don’t know I think that’s the right way to say it but then contributes to the overall health of the brain of the mind. Then obviously, we know now that if you continuously pursue new interests, love a new language or learn music or painting or something on a consistent basis, in order to learn not to achieve anything but to learn the learning part itself keep the brain active, we now know that we also now know that if you just simply play any game, not to win, not to master the game, but just play any game. I did a podcast many, many months ago. And I talked about how by just simply going into the sunlight, or simply leaving the elevation and going up, in other words, climbing a mountain or hiking a little bit higher than where you usually stay a little bit higher that tends to activate the brain. So any kind of exercise that is interesting as challenging. And you do that, from time to time, gives the necessary nutrients to the brain to function keeps the mind active.

One thing that I want to also point out, when I go into consultations, I hear people telling me about all the stress they have in life. People complain about generic stress. Most people don’t spend enough time to explore within the overall stress they’re feeling, what specific areas of life from where the stress is coming from. So there is no specificity they don’t invest in finding specific reasons why they’re experiencing stress. So a part of keeping the mind active does involve that you recognizing your stress from where it’s coming, why it’s coming, and what kind of response you have for it.

If you had challenges in the past, and you went through a lot, but you did overcome those challenges. That means you have a response to stress. Why not bring those memories back? Let’s say you are facing a situation right now. Why not bring those memories back and strengthen your response, because you already have a response pattern within you to deal with what’s happening right now.

A few days ago, I think yesterday, or maybe the day before yesterday, I talked about how and why it’s important that you express yourself, and keep the emotions within you keeping your feelings within you. Emotions, let’s talk about that first. Emotions, you know, if you bottle up emotions, then it’s challenging. It takes you down. Expressing yourself sometimes is difficult. But while you are happy expressing all good things in life? Why not express things that are bothering you? You have a sad feeling love a scary feeling. Why not express those feelings to someone who is near and dear to you, a friend of yours. And if you professionally want to do that, that’s an extended thought. But then not necessary. Just why not talk to people who love you and care for you. And tell them this is how you’re feeling. This is how you’re experiencing something deep within you. And take the feeling out express its views in a way before it does any damage to the mind.

See, life is about thoughts and feelings. Life is an interplay of thoughts and feelings. So sometimes when the thoughts are not right, you have to manipulate the feelings to align the thoughts. And sometimes the feelings are incorrect. You have to tweak the thoughts to change the feelings to say it’s this cyclical, the circular and relationships are made directly proportional to each other. Now, here’s what we know. Here’s what I know people who are on top of their feelings usually win in the race of life anyway.

One example I have shared, I have experienced myself and I’ve shared this multiple times with many of my clients also on this podcast at some point for sure on my radio show, which is you don’t need to talk and express your feelings to anybody. Why not write down those feelings? They could paper write how you’re feeling within yourself. And legends, celebrities, stars, extraordinarily successful individuals from history. They have all done this to express themselves on paper in Saudi became stronger day by day, they became stronger and achieved much bigger things that they never thought that they would achieve in the first place. It’s not necessary that you have to talk to someone, you can express your feelings, write them by writing on paper, which improves your writing skills. And a month or two later, when you go back and you start looking at what you wrote, you’ll be amazed, did I write all this? What was I thinking when I wrote this? So here’s how I want to wrap this up today, this podcast, he got to participate in activities that bring joy and laughter frequently. You got to consistently find new interests, and engage yourself in playing some games. That gives the mind the necessary workout. You got to also understand how you react to your reactions to situations primarily to stress. And you have to do whatever you have to do to express yourself. And you don’t bottle up your emotions.

These are some ideas, some thoughts, I don’t think these are all complete. I don’t think I can spend the next three hours or five hours here on this podcast, I still cannot touch the topic called Mind. And this whole podcast and everything that I do has to do with my mind anyway. But there are so many other strategies that will address how to put the mind in a peak performance state in a peak condition. And this is not complete this podcast is not complete, at least not this episode. So my idea is that you at least this will, this will motivate you this loop just by you. My idea is that this will motivate you, this will inspire you. And then you will do whatever is necessary. If you want to go deeper into this, you will do your own research. But at least this will give you the start. That’s the goal of this podcast. I’m going to stop here.

Hopefully, this is helpful. If it is do me a favor, write a review, share the podcast with your friends and family. And then you have any questions for me on the direct line, my phone number is 888-818-0404. That’s all for now. Wherever you are, be safe. Talk soon. Bye now.

Speaking is Sharing

Here is the complete transcript of the podcast

Welcome back to Success with Srini. Happy Monday morning to you. Unbelievable. This is the last week before the month of March is done for the year 2022. In fact, 90 days of this year are over. I hope you’re pursuing your goals, your dreams, your ambitions that you set for yourself at the beginning of this year, 90 days are almost gone. I started this podcast thinking I may not survive, maybe a month at the most, maybe two. If I can go till the end of February achieved a milestone. But I’m pretty close to the 90-day milestone, which is amazing for me. And this has kind of become a play now. Not work for me anymore. I wake up I record. Okay.

Today on the podcast, I want to highlight a conversation I had with a friend of mine who after following my podcasts, my radio shows for a long, long time. He asked me this question. He said, How can I become a good speaker like you? Okay. I can tell you for sure. I’m not a good speaker. I miss my words, I lose my thoughts. I’m not well prepared. I don’t put forward. I don’t have a good vocabulary. And multiple times I have said this on this podcast. I don’t consider myself to be a speaker. But somehow he thinks that I do. Like he has to reach up to my level. wherein I don’t have any level, to begin with. In fact, I was so scared that I never went to Toastmasters. I mentioned this multiple times. I never went to Toastmasters. I was so scared because people would say oh, you said a year who said I’m there. And some real constructive feedback they would give. If I would go to toastmasters meetings, I never went so I never got. So I don’t think I have any level of preparation to call myself a speaker. Or that I claim that I can speak well. So the discussion from there went to what’s the difference? See the traditional books on speaking. They all talk the common things like you got to prepare your intro Well or your body of the speech? Well, you need to have stories, you need to have a good conclusion, you need to have a good call to action, all that you got to listen, you got to give compliments as you’re speaking. You got to be sincere the way you come across your body language has to be a certain way. Got to speak clearly. And need to have a good vocabulary base. All that which is all good. numerous books on this topic and numerous other teachers and mentors teaching how you can speak. I’ll tell you, I don’t think I have any of that stuff. And I was very clear to this friend of mine. And that kept me awake.

That conversation kept me awake days over the last few days. So what is it? That why is my friend telling me that he wants to match up to what I’m doing? And what can I tell him that I have that he should do? Well, why did I not tell him what I have? My idea was to kind of help him like, you think that I have something that I could give to him. So here is what I came up with. This is my self-exploration about myself. The first and foremost is in any conversation, whether it’s from the stage or one on one conversations or in consultations, the core underlying messages that I make every attempt to cherish people, to you fundamentally cannot convey anything if you don’t love people. In fact, you should never be in a public business if you don’t love people. So it starts from loving people and I said that multiple times here on this podcast too. So I cherish people and I’m not there to influence them. I’m not there to attract them towards me. I’m not there to tell them what they need to do. And I’m not there to tell them that look what I have done. None of that stuff. The goal is to cherish people. What happens when we cherish people are fundamentally deceptive. We all are receptive. We all are looking for something that can better our lives. We all are magnets going around trying to attract so because Everybody’s trying to attract something, there is nothing else that you have to do or I have to do.

We need to just present ourselves with whatever they are expecting from us. That’s all, I present here myself on this podcast to help. And if you’re seeking help, this will help. If not, it’s okay. At least this is a broadcast mechanism, I have no idea who is listening. People are receptive to anything, but you have got to say, if they can understand, or if they believe, or if they can feel that you are sincere, and that you have a sincere interest in them, and that you want to help them. When they perceive that you have an agenda, then they will run away. It’s not about people, it’s even one on one interactions, private conversations, all that they run away. The only way you could really cherish others is when you are grateful for what you have. For mindset is I deserve I in fact, have less than what I have given to others. Life should have given me more I have met those kinds of people too. And the wrong frame of looking at life and living with that kind of emotion. It’s a bad life. It’s a life filled with hurt, pain, agony to sinfulness. You can’t extend positive feelings to others when you’re leading a life with that kind of a frame. And your sentences will never increase, your reach will never increase.

Your boundaries will be limited. Your moments will be constrained. So starts with cherishing people. And the best way to cherish people is through your words. Don’t say I have good feelings for someone feelings are invisible. Don’t say that I have good intentions for you. Unless you said that on the face. Starts with cherishing people, then it comes down to you holding your self esteem as high as possible. Your job is to contribute. And you’re good at that. And for you to really feel that you’re good at that is you have a deep retrospective of yourself on all the accomplishments you had in the past. If you can’t count and tabulate all the accomplishments you had in the past, then you cannot hold on to your self-esteem. Because in the moment, you might be attacked at the moment you could be rattled by things around you. The only thing that keeps you intact is self esteem. And I said that I think yesterday on the podcast. Then in every conversation, you express your emotions. See in this podcast up till this point, if you don’t if not hearing my motions, I lost you. If my motion is not words, these are not scripts that I’m reading, or this is nothing, no preparation for this is these are words, words that are completely coming from the court of the depth of the heart and coming across. If it’s not then forget about I’m losing you now I probably lost you for the life. If not to come back, listen anything it’s over. So I hear people who don’t express their emotions when they’re presenting them talking. They get into discussing conflicts on the face or discussing things about some other events that are happening around the world and politics and why Why should I discuss a conflict with you without knowing your affiliation without knowing your position?

You can only express your feelings for honest to yourself for not honest to yourself means you have not discovered your true feelings. When people have not identified their true feelings, they can not speak in a constructive manner.
It’s that simple. Then comes focusing on the present moment when I’m speaking with anyone, not in a discussion, I’m fully focused on this situation. Of course, there are distractions, I don’t create distractions. I give full attention, my mind is zoned in totally to see what can I do for them. I have also seen good speakers, well-rounded speakers, they lead meaningful life. They are lifelong learners, they’re committed to learning. They take pleasure in using the time in the most constructive manner possible. They want to do good work. And when they do good work, essentially, every time they’re given an opportunity to speak, they’re only conveying the good work that they have done. And also seen good speakers consistently practicing what they’re preaching. Language is a thing, which improves when you practice. Language goes away if you don’t practice. I studied my childhood, I went to school, I learned the language. And for the last 25 years, I’m away from a country living all over the world. And I’ve started to forget those words, phrases, idioms that I learned, as a kid in the school, in my native language, goes away, it doesn’t stay, doesn’t stay. So every opportunity that I see where I go to a store, I find somebody in there Porter or whatever, and they’re speaking, a language that I can speak, I know five languages, six languages, in six languages you want to somebody speaking, and if I’m speaking to somebody, I discovered that they can speak any of those six languages, I try to move to that language and speak as much as I can. And sometimes I tell them, Listen, I speak six languages, three of them are not good. If they’re not good, they’re not good. I’m, I tell them that, so that I am in a way, I’m taking the permission to speak to them in that language. But if I make mistakes, they will over overlook that, knowing that I don’t know that language that well. But the point here is, if you don’t practice, it goes away. So, a good speech has to be practiced, a good message has to be practiced. A good delivery has to be practiced. So these are four or five things that I was trying to convey to my friend, these are things I do not necessary, that need to be done. And these are all learnable skills and these skills. These are things that I’ve seen others do and I got them into my life.

Not that I was born with it. So you keep cherishing people, you keep your self esteem high as much as possible. You express your emotions as much as possible. You focus on people, you lead a meaningful life and you’re away from people and you practice whatever you want to convey in it consistently for a long period of time. If you are considering becoming a speaker, if you’re considering becoming a presenter, or somebody taking an influencer position, any aspect of life, then I’m hoping that today’s podcast will help dig this, if you have something else that you would like to contribute to what I just said, let me know. Text me the number in my direct podcast number is 888-818-0404. You can text me you can call me on that, leave me a message. And I will try to improve even whatever I shared here a bit more with your input. That’s all for now. solver. Now you have a wonderful Monday, and I’ll catch you tomorrow with a new podcast episode. Stay tuned.

It’s Important That You Believe In Yourself

Here is the complete transcript of the podcast

Happy and bright Sunday morning to you. Welcome back to Success with Srini on the podcast episode today, I’m going back to one of the presentations I did last weekend at the real estate roundtable. And this was towards the end of the day, and I was talking about how to use hypnosis to make positive changes in life. My idea was to do a demo, but we ran out of time, and we had to vacate the facility. So I couldn’t really go through the whole demonstration. But then I was prepping myself up for the demo. And as a part of the process, I was explaining what hypnosis is. And I said, if you do this right, then nothing in life can bother you. Because you create a wall within yourself, you compartmentalize your brain. And I give my own personal example that my mom came down with cancer, my dad came down with a stroke. And none of these things bothered me to a level otherwise they would bother someone. Now, how do you do this? How do you create these compartments? How do you compartmentalize your brain? How do you deal with things that are coming at you that you have no control over situations, people’s circumstances? And how do you find yourself in a way within which you’re holding the ground and you are in control?

Now, this is the truth of life. We will never have anybody outside of us for ourselves. Let me rephrase this. In your life, the most important person is you, you do not have anybody else other than you to yourself. Everybody else has come in. And everybody else may leave. And the only day you leave is when you leave. So you’re only for yourself, that’s the starting point.
So if you are to yourself, then why not? You are yourself. So to be yourself, you have to believe in yourself.

So the question becomes is how do you believe in yourself? If you don’t believe in yourself, now the strategies work. So this wall, this compartmentalization of the brain, all these things work, if you believe in yourself. So what can you do to strengthen your belief system? The first and the foremost is this, we got to know ourselves. This is where people start. This is what people realize very late in life that they need to know themselves. They spend a while, sometimes while means years decades, trying to figure out who they are. They read books. They go to places of a higher power. They roam around the world. Some people find themselves, by the way, most don’t. So it starts with knowing yourself. Well, what do we need to know about ourselves? The first and foremost is Who Am I? How do I describe myself to someone who doesn’t know me? So I sit down and write a description of myself. My name is and I do this. I was born to I was born. educated me, I got some education. I studied, I excelled. And I graduated through layers of life and layers of education. And then I got into the stream of life. You write and keep on writing about yourself. When you’re finished, you read? Does it give you a clearer idea of who you are, when you read it? It doesn’t give you a clear idea that says, then do what? Go back. Write down who you are. Describe yourself. How do you describe yourself to somebody who doesn’t know you really start the process again? Go through the whole thing, then bleed does it give you or the reader a clearer idea? Do you read yourself? Once you read yourself? Do you feel that it gives a clear idea to somebody who doesn’t know you? Is somebody else is reading it? Would they get a clearer idea of who you are? If they don’t then rewrite. Keep on writing.

Amazing how many times are you wrote this See, we develop a clear understanding of who we are. By studying how we react, in certain situations somebody is attacking you, somebody is making a remark on you, maybe in person or maybe in the public, how you react to that defines who you are. If you react, understand there are 20, 30, 40, 50 people around you who are watching you. The way you react is the message that goes to the rest of the people, about your capabilities and about your senses. It’s a part of knowing yourself. A part of strengthening your belief system is also you being comfortable with your own feelings. Every time you feel a certain way, recognize the feeling, write it down. I sometimes become angry, let’s say, Do we all do? We are humans. If you are human, you will become angry. So given it’s an innate emotion, it comes the function of the brain. Anything that’s extreme is not good. But the presence of every emotion has to be there to live a fulfilled life. So anger is okay. Now, every time you get angry, you got to see what are the leading triggers? Or what are the leading events that trigger the anger, you write it down? Then you start modifying the leading events. So you don’t get to the point of being or becoming angry. If you’re feeling sad, then why are you becoming sad? What are the leading events for you feeling that sadness, eliminate them? Now, this is one way to find yourself and obviously strengthen your belief system. But then the most important point is why you find the negatives in you. If you find irregularities in you, it’s also important to find the strengths in you. Because strengthening your strengths also strengthens your belief system. So everything that is strong about you has to be recognized and has to be celebrated. Not by anybody else, but by you.

So I know my strengths, I know my weaknesses. Or at least I work on strengthening my strengths. At the same time, I always keep on trying to discover my weaknesses. And all of us, everybody, everybody knows their weaknesses. They don’t talk about them. But they know. Sometimes finding strong points is hard. So that’s why people tell me nothing is going for me, nothing is happening for me. Well, you are here. And you’re talking to me. So something is going on something is right about you. What is it? I really make them start to go deep into themselves. And that’s when they start telling me that’s when they start recognizing here things are, in fact not as bad as you think they are? Of course, they do not see all of us. You mean all of us. We have all made it here through some really challenging events in life. And we need to pause and acknowledge that fact that we have gone through have we gone through extremes of extremes? No. No, may not be. But then still, we have our experience is mine. Your experience is yours. I can’t question your experience. I can’t say that my effort is more than yours. It’s like me saying my mother is better than your mother doesn’t work that way. It’s very easy to recount all the typical features of life. All the good things people forget bad things they do remember. So if 10 years ago, you had a bad situation 15 years ago, five years ago, three years ago, and you have made it through all what makes you think that you will not get through the one that you’re going through now? Well, that’s not the point of the discussion. The point of the discussion is that because you have gone through that, that means there is something of real power within you. So that’s your strength. Or you start recognizing the strength you’re now strengthening your belief system. And that’s why we say he always stays inspired, always has courage, builds yourself to have the courage. So, seriously, if you have gone through some difficult challenges in life, it means you showed some level of courage, you saw some level of grit, you had some personal strength, all that got you here. So that means you are an achiever.

One other thing that can strengthen your belief system is the ability to admit when you make a mistake. I can’t tell you how much this has changed my life. If I make a mistake, I say I’m sorry, but you’re under the deal. In fact, if anybody does a mistake, even on my side of the office, any of my employees or anyone, any of my co-workers, I take responsibility for that, because you are subscribed, you’re listening to me. There’s no customer service, there are no sales and marketing and customer service, customer care, all these departments, and departments. Only one man in the fund, something goes wrong in Tesla, who gets blamed only one man in the fund. something great happens in the slop, obviously. And the fun takes the credit. So you take the credit, you take the blame. So what do you do? Here’s what I found out. All of us are wrong. This is the truth. All of us are wrong. And you know how wrong we are. We are wrong more than once in a day, multiple times you’re wrong in a day. So when you close your date night, or when you start? I don’t know, I’m hoping that you’re listening to me this morning. And you’re going to end the day today, right? When you end the day. You acknowledge that you made something wrong. You tell yourself yeah, I did something wrong. Even though you did everything right. It keeps you humble keeps you grounded. strengthening your belief system. See people who recognize their own errors that are considered wise. We cannot correct mistakes unless we see them in the first place. So if you’re not doing it, you got to start opening yourself up to honestly acknowledging that. By doing this, you’re now building the ability to deal with any situation that could potentially go wrong in the future. Okay, so the case in point on today’s podcast is that if you believe in yourself, your life will become easier. As simple as that. And because you have only you to yourself, you better be yourself and to be yourself. You need to believe in yourself. Believing yourself brings a tremendous amount of confidence it raises your self-esteem. The only person you got to believe is you.

For now, you have a wonderful remainder of the Sunday. And I’ll catch you tomorrow morning and we’re going to have another incredible coaching podcast session. Stay tuned, bye now.