Always Act Never React

Here is the complete transcript of the podcast

Welcome back to Success with Srini. Today on this podcast episode, I’m dealing with a question that has come in from a listener of this podcast and also a listener of my radio show, asking me about my thoughts on stress, how to deal with stress. Now, this listener has been listening to my radio shows and some of the recent radio shows where I talked about hypnosis, as a mechanism as a tool to deal with several dysfunctions of life, and stress happens to be a dysfunction of life. So the question is, what do you think should I try? I tried many, and I didn’t get a response, I didn’t get the result at the level that I expected. So what do you suggest I do? Now, before I answered the question, the reason why I took that question is they didn’t ask this question for the podcast. But this was a kind of a preliminary question of this individual trying to figure out if they should engage with me.

Now, here is how I look at a solution. Every time we talk about a solution and how the solution works for a problem, we need to understand the origin of the problem. Stress, in general, is stress. But then the nature of the stress and the source of stress needs to be understood before we apply a solution to the problem itself. So got understand where it is coming from the source of this problem, and then we can find a solution to fit the problem to solve the problem. Now in generic solution for genetic stress, is kind of hit and miss, like, you can’t just take stress as it is, and say, Okay, fine, I have a generic solution for any kind of stress, it doesn’t work. It’s just like it’s a mismatch.

So here’s how I would approach this. The first and foremost thing is to understand the triggers the sources of stress, where are you getting this class from, for example, people get stressed from their environment. Sometimes people get stressed from interaction with other people, like relationships, at work at home, or sometimes in the crowds and parties, sometimes, just some people being critical, and some people being rude to them, sometimes dealing with moody, indecisive, and unreliable people. So all kinds of interactions and social interactions could create stress also, then there is institutional stress, right rules, regulations, boundaries, borders, bureaucracy, red tape, all that introduce a kind of stress. And obviously, you have projects to work on, you have deadlines to meet your meetings, formalities, you have office policies that you have to live up to all that introduces stress, then major life events, they create stress, like getting married, getting divorced, having a child that in the family promotion, or a job loss, all that induces stress, some forms of stress life stress space for about maybe 12 or 24 months, because there is a duration that stress has to play out. You had a baby just now. So you will go through stress for about 346 months, as the baby is growing and attaining different stages. So some events last for long. That’s the point.

Now, sometimes, you also have stress because of daily hassles, like traffic taxes, waiting in the lines, some home maintenance stuff, people getting stressed out, waiting at traffic lights, and trying to find parking spots. So all these things give stress. The question becomes is before you jump and say, I’m experiencing a lot of stress in life, you need to segregate, you need to draw and say okay, this is the specific stress. And this is the source from where the specific stress is coming. That’s the key. That’s the basic benchmark that you need to set before you jump into looking. Should I do yoga, should I do meditation? Should I try hypnosis, guess what everything works. There is a generic solution to generic stress. But that’s not what is going to give you the result. The result is when you identify specific stress that has a definitive source. I hope I’m coming across the system, serious stuff. Now, you can try whatever solution you want to try. But here is the general gist of this. The best way to deal with stress is not to take stress, is to prevent stress is to block stress or restrict stress. And the way you do that, I’m going to share a few techniques or a few approaches here. You can try doing this, but then again, this is not the solution. So this is I’m assuming that you are trying to prevent stress, because prevention is better than cure at any point in time for anything. So these are some things that you have to do to prevent stress.

The first and foremost thing is, you should learn how to act, and never to react. Never react, for example, somebody sends you a text message, wait for five minutes, or 10 minutes before you say something. If somebody’s yelling and shouting at you wait for five minutes before you say anything. I have a mental clock in my mind, if somebody is yelling at me, or somebody is showing the emotions of somebody is showing some anguish. Then I wait, I count 10. In my mind, before I respond. If I respond, I’ve seen this every time I have responded in line with their expression of emotion. I’m creating enmity I’m creating a fight. That’s the first one. The second part is you need to learn to say so what if something is seriously going wrong, something is you know, somebody is annoying you, somebody, you’re stuck in the traffic and you need to deal with taxes and you are missing deadlines. Ask the question. So what? It’s amazing when you put yourself in that state, everything that you do anything that you’re doing today, you got to preempt every act by asking one question, which is, what is the greater good? That’s going to happen? As a result of me doing this? What is the greater good in this? Whatever that is?

So before I started today’s podcast, I did ask this question, what is the greater good I’m doing as a result of doing this podcast? Yeah, there is a deadline to be met. Yes, this podcast has to go out. Yeah, all that is good. But then what is the greater good, the greater good is? Maybe nobody’s listening. But then what if somebody is listening? What if this is despite this one technique, this stress today is the only thing that they were looking for a solution for. And they happen to be stumbling upon this podcast today from nowhere, and they’re listening to this, and this is the only thing that is going to create the success that they are seeking or the breakthrough, or the transformation, that they have been waiting for years.

What if that means I need to preempt that in my mind, I need to have that in my mind before I attempt recording this podcast. If not, this is the job for me. If that meaning is not there, then this is not the way this whole thing becomes a futile effort is futile. One other thing, in any situation that you step yourself into, let’s say you are stuck in traffic and you hit the traffic and you need to get to the destination You’re getting late is what if that moment is your last moment? What if life stops in that moment. So and it has not stopped. That means you are given, you still have time on your side time is playing for you. Your life has not stopped, your heart has not stopped, you have a life you will get there. But a lot of people never get there. You see, once you bring that kind of perspective, you will never have stress. It’s impossible to have stress when you think like that. That is what we call living in gratitude. And I’ve seen this happen, people experienced stress because of the Forgotten gratitude, the forgotten what a blessing this life is how they have been given this. No animal has been given this. No other life form has been given this. It has been given to us humans. And we run around squandering it away. You know life is a gift. Very few people appreciate this gift. They spent days, months years deep depressive state, blaming someone for victimizing them. Why? Yes, you can try meditation. Yes, you can try yoga. Yes, you can try hypnosis. Yes, you can try anything and everything and you should. Why shouldn’t you? Try that which you know, will work and stay with something that works for you.

Okay, that’s all for now. I’m going to stop here. Have a wonderful Thursday. Tomorrow is the weekend. I’m gonna come back. I’m gonna keep it short tomorrow. Talk soon. Bye now.

Life Is All About Actions & Transformations

Here is the complete transcript of the podcast

Welcome back to Success with Srini, Happy Hump Day to you. Today on the podcast, I want to take up a topic that is very simple. And I thought about talking about this a while ago. But then I waited a few weeks because I wanted to build up the engagement with all the listeners, hopefully, you are here with me, hopefully, you are listening to the podcast. Hopefully, you have been part of this new change since we started on January 1 of the year 2022. So we’re all almost like a month and a half over a month now almost two months into the podcast now, February 23. Now, long time already. So I wanted to wait so that everybody, all the listeners, whoever is listening and kind of in sync with the way I’m thinking here. So in relation to everything that has been discussed on this podcast up till now, including your questions, including your comments, including your feedback, I think it’s time to talk about today’s concept. Now, this has to do with actions and transformations. You talk to anybody, you talk to anyone if I ask you this question now, right now, do you need a transformation? And if you are any which way inclined towards success, you will say yes. Everybody needs a transformation. without even asking what kind of transformation it is everybody, including me, also needs a transformation, I need multiple of those today or forever. So all of us are looking to transform ourselves. This is the truth. Every mind wants to transform itself. It’s observing, it’s listening, it’s processing, every mind wants to change itself. Good or bad is completely up to you. But it’s looking for a change, every mind is changing. Every mind is growing. Every mind is expanding. Every mind is looking for something. So transformation is everywhere. Now, how do you bring in this transformation? There are three simple steps.

The first is by manipulating your thoughts. Whatever thoughts, whatever they are, you simply manipulate the thought. So you woke up this morning thinking, I’m not feeling good, or this is not going right or you simply manipulate the thought. And you do that by saying, Oh, this is going good. I woke up wonderful. This is great. This is awesome. This is going to be brilliant. This is my day. So you simply change the words. So you change the words you are manipulating the thought.

The next part is thought Genesis, which is you go out looking for a new thought. We do that by reading books, listening to some great conversations, or by having interactions with people. Were looking for new thoughts by seeking a new thought, you’re transforming yourself.

The third technique here is what is called thought alignment. So somebody has a great thought, somebody has a great idea, a great concept. You align yourself with them. Oh, this individual is doing this? How can I become a part of this project? Or this idea or this concept? How would I tag along with them? Nothing wrong? How about a debate going on? Which side should I align myself with? And why not? A great conversation? How can I participate in this conversation? So transformation happens at the taught level. And this is been the message on this podcast for a long time. I’ve been driving this forever. So it all starts with the thought.

Now, let’s take the discussion to action for a second. Again, this principle is based on actions and transformations. So actions are necessary for transformation. Just by thinking, things don’t happen. We need to act, right. So let’s talk about actions. The three things you can do when it comes to actions. Number one is the time that you spend with yourself. What do you do? What actions do you take? What do you do with your time? So if you raise or if you manage the time that you spend with yourself, then your overall actions become better. Now, shift that for a second. And how about the time you spend with others with other people. You find a few quality people in your life and you go spend time with them. I do this all the time.
I do this all the time. As much as people reach out to me for consultations, I call people and reach out to them to spend time differences, they don’t charge me any. Eventually, all of my mentors became my friends. This is funny, all my mentors, all you know, they all became my friends, but you get the idea, I spent time with them. Because simply talking to them having interactions with them, rages my activity level.

I’m not looking to create new actions in my life, I’m just by simply spending time with them. It reaches my performance, it’s amazing. Then, obviously, the time with work, the work that you do, how much time you’re spending, how much really you’re spending, how much you are, how much you are putting in and how much you are getting out, and how much time you’re staying in between. See, time with yourself, time with others, and time with work will raise the quality of your actions, you raise the quality of your actions, and you raise the quality of the transformation by thought manipulation, thought Genesis, and thought alignment do these two things. Life is in between these two things. That’s it. Obviously, there are other things to this, if you want to take this conversation even a little bit deeper, you have habits that are coming in your skills, and you know a lot of things and again, I can expand on this. But the point is, let’s keep it between transformations and actions today. And I want you to now take at least one element. Can you bring in a new thought? Can you align with somebody who is having a good thought? Can you manipulate a negative thought in your mind today? Then again, go manipulate the time, time with yourself time with people, and time with the work that you’re doing. And you do this even 10 or 15% Then why would you not become successful? Why would you not create success? You see how this is going?

Okay, that’s all I’ll stop here. Have a wonderful Wednesday today and I will talk tomorrow. Okay, take care. Bye now.

Organize Your Life; Dump, Delegate, Defer or Do

Here is the complete transcript of the podcast

Welcome, or welcome back to Success with Srini. Today on the podcast, I want to drive a point that’s completely opposite to what I talked about yesterday. Yesterday, I was insisting that it’s important that we improve the mind, the diet, the sleep, the activities, everything should be tailored towards improving the mind the health of the mind, so that we could live to well into our 80s 90s and hundreds if need be.

Today, I’m driving a point. No matter where you exist today, you need to improve your surroundings. The bedroom, the living room, the kitchen, the house, the car, the closet, the bank accounts, the inboxes, everything needs to be improved. And what do you have to do to improve everything that’s around you? That’s the topic of today’s podcast. I have done numerous radio shows numerous Facebook Lives. In fact, I did a whole seminar, a part seminar, a half a day seminar on driving this point on how to organize your life. In one of the Facebook Lives, I showed the exact tools that I used to organize my life. I showed how I took 76 boxes of paper and completely dumped, I scanned and dumped I spent about a year and a half scanning, there are some loose papers even today, despite me catching up, I still have some papers, I still have some books that I still need to get rid of. But everything and anything that I don’t need, I need to get rid of. So it starts with organizing your surrounding it starts with you becoming intentional about cleaning up things around you stuff that you do not need stuff that is that has no relevance and no meaning your life has to go away. So the first and the foremost thing is you’ve got to dump stuff that you don’t need anymore. And there are different formulas on how to arrive at what you do not need. Some people say things that you have not used for a year or more, that has to go away, there is some truth to it. But then again, that’s the call that you have to make. First and foremost, you got to dump everything that you do not need, or you’re not using anymore. If you’re not using any more, that means you don’t need it anyway, if you need it, you can always go by, it’s okay to buy. The second part of this organizing your surrounding is you need to delegate some things.

For example, you want to eat home-cooked food, but you’re not able to, then there are several services online, that they will cook and deliver food to your house. Or you can hire a part-time cook to come and cook maybe three times a week for your anything and everything that can be delegated, that which you don’t want to do, or that which is not a good investment of your time, or that in which you don’t have the skill. Why not delegate that? Think about delegating, listen, it may cost you some money, but then the amount of mental space that you can free up to do even bigger things that are in line with who you are. And with your skills and talents. Why struggle in those areas where you can otherwise get help. Now, there are certain things in life that can be deferred. A few things can be deferred, why not defer to Why create clutter around in your, in your thinking primarily on getting some things done, when those things inherently don’t have importance at this point in time in your life. They have some importance, but they are not the priority. I see people hanging on to things around them thinking that that is the thing that they need to accomplish very soon. But they are busy doing other things, but they have this in front of them. They never will ever get to. So if you are not getting it done, and you know it needs to be done, but you’re not getting it done right now, why not defer it? And why not plan it in such a way that Okay, six months from now or three months from now, I’m going to get to this on this date. And I’m going to get it done. And then why not do things? Why not do things? Right? There are things that need to be get done now. So do it.

This podcast has to be done. I’m doing it. That’s it. There is no way out of there’s no way out for me from this. I need to do it. So there are things that you know you have to do so dump, delegate, defer, do this principle. It’s not my principle, this principle I followed. And this is from a book called Getting Things Done. Get the book, Getting Things Done, profound book, I picked this. And ever since my life has been simple, there is one other book that I recommend that you should read, which is the power of less, I read that book once a year, at the end of the year, beginning of the year, this year, I completed reading it in January, the power of less, it’s a mandatory read for me, at the beginning of every year, the book is I think, about 105 or 110 pages. It’s a quick read, it’s a wonderful read, get the book, read it. Beyond just simply getting and reading the books, books are awesome, books are amazing, they have a lot of wisdom in them. The biggest thing is that I want to subscribe to the idea that it’s important to organize your surroundings.

That’s the core message of today’s podcast. So even if you can empty one box, even if you can empty part of the closet today, even if you can empty or clean up your car, that’s progress. You see 1% improvement every day, you do that over the next 365 days, your life is gonna be brilliant. In fact, 1% a day improvement over 365 days is not 360 5% improvement 1% A day compounded over the next 365 days. deep deep returns on investment if you get this right, so 1% improvement is what you’re seeking. So try 1% improvement in the surroundings. In fact, it’s easier to create that 1% change in your surroundings, than creating 1% change inside of you. Dropping a habit creates a new, a new habit or dropping a negative attitude putting a positive attitude all that it’s invisible if you don’t know you don’t get gratification from doing it. But if you organize things around you, you get instant gratification. So try doing that.

I’m gonna stop here. Appreciate you listening to the podcast. And I’ll be back here again tomorrow and we will continue the discussion. Stay tuned.