Here is the complete transcript of the podcast
Welcome back to Success with Srini. Today on the podcast, we are talking about emotional triggers, we will try to understand what emotional triggers are, if you’re very new to this concept, I’m sure you’re gonna find value in this. And if you already know what emotional triggers are, then we’ll talk about managing them and how to better manage them. And my intent, my goal is that by the time we are done, you will understand and manage your triggers, you will be in a situation to do that. But then over a period of time, very quickly, very quickly, the next three to six months, you become a master at managing your emotional triggers. Now, what are emotional triggers emotional triggers, by definition is a trigger is an experience that pulls us back to the past and causes the old feelings or old behaviors to come up or rise up or arise.
Okay, so something that takes you behind and timeline makes you feel the same experience of an event that might have happened. And you’ll go to the same feelings one more time. And that means as a result of how you feel, or how you felt back in time, you also start to behave like that. Because that’s those are your emotions trying to express themselves. So that is what a trigger is an event that causes you to go back in time. Now that these events could be external, or they could be internal. So there is could be an external event that could happen, that will take you back in time mentally, or maybe something within you is also causing you to go back in time. So let’s talk about the internal part first, internally, maybe you are carrying a lot of conflicts. And they are in conflict could be for multiple reasons. And because now you have conflicts, you can’t live in the moment. And the present moment, you can’t enjoy the present moment. And you are mentally going backward. I wish my life I was it was great when I was in college, or I was great when I was with my parents and I was in a different country or whatever. And you always go back in time, because you can’t deal with the current conflict. That part of you constantly thinking about your past, now you go back there, then you are literally, there could be something else there. So you people usually go back to the happy state mostly when, when there are too many conflicts going on. there or there could be some external things that could trigger maybe a social situation that you’re a part of, and you go you get into conversation, or you make a point or you get into a debate, whatever it is, that could trigger something, and that will take you back in time. Okay, so quite a number of things.
To this, this, we all have triggers, all of us have triggers. And there are things that can trigger all of us, and they do. But at the core of all this is memory, you retain a lot of memory, a lot of things within you, it’s possible that at some point in time, you will recall those memories and you will process them when you have time. And sometimes you may recall a bad memory, sometimes you recall a good memory. So memory plays a huge role in all this. Somebody who doesn’t have a memory may not recall any of the events that might have happened in the past, they will not go back to the past. That’s a brilliant state to be in Honestly speaking, you get the point. Now, how do you resolve this? How do you make sure that when there is a trigger, it doesn’t push you back in time? It doesn’t bring back an old memory. And even if it does, then how do you resolve it in such a way that it doesn’t impact your current living? That’s the question at the foremost of all this is that. Let’s take people as an example. So you are there because there are people around you. All of us have people around us. Some of these people are core to us. They’re not really they’re not relationships, some are external to us, but we are surrounded by people. And
every individual is unique is different. Everybody’s different. I’m different. You’re different. All of us. We have unique identities. No two people are the same Doesn’t matter, the world keeps on expanding, and more and more people get added to this. But everybody is going to be unique, everybody’s different. So there is no point to expect others to be like you. Because no two people are the same. So if I take that as a premise, if I take that as the foundation, that means as an individual, as a well-rounded, grown-up individual leading my life, I should accept individual differences. Differences exist. So I don’t want a difference. I don’t want an individual’s opinion on something to trigger something within me, I’ll drag myself back in time. And once I go back in time, I experienced all kinds of other stuff.
No point in giving headspace or mind space. To an individual, I know that there is there’s a difference already. It may be true. And oftentimes, it is true that everybody around us is much more talented, talented than us. And they have more gifts, you know, like meet people who are extremely talented, a lot of gifts in them. And I know in which way identical to them or even come any closer to them. I understand that I respect the difference, but I don’t allow them to intimidate me. Talk about your internal triggers for a second, for the most effective way to deal with internal triggers is to keep writing a journal, taking your emotions and resolving them very quickly as they happen on a daily basis. That’s where I would, I would start. A long time ago in multiple seminars, I’ve done this in many seminars, I’ve shown a slide, I put forward a slide where I say, there’s something a concept called perceptional position shift. When I’m facing a challenge in my life, I try to perceptional change my position on the challenge, I say if my father is in the situation, what will he do? If my uncle would have been in the situation, what would they do? So I take different people’s positions in a conflict, too, and then remove myself to see how they will deal with the conflict mentally. So that gives me the strength to deal with the triggers or the stimuli that are coming at me, I also understand my capacity to see if I sit here and process 2000 emotions, I can’t do it impossible. It’s not fun to think about something in the past that has gone wrong, and drive myself crazy or drive myself crazy on a highway or in a high manner or drive myself crazy in a low manner. There’s no point in doing that.
So I understand my capacity. So if you understand your capacity, you can become assertive. See, people don’t become assertive, because they don’t understand the capacity, the thing they can fill more into who they are. And that’s when they lose their standing. Now, there are other concepts in this, you know, if you should take some time to relax and, and, and, you know, look into different alternatives, things like passions and other activities that take you out of situations. So that you don’t need to the trigger effects aren’t there. Right. So if you remove somebody from a conflict zone, they will not see the conflict. So they feel good about themselves. All that is good. And if you take if I take this discussion even further and say yeah, go work out, go exercise, do yoga, do meditation, do hypnosis, all those things, you know all I can add all that stuff to this. And I’ll say go build some relationships outside and strengthen your network. That’s also good advice, I think. But the bottom line is this. The bottom line and the most important part of all this are that you got to be compassionate towards your own self. You need to be compassionate to people around you who have a difference or a different opinion of life and how they process things. You need to show compassion towards them, but more compassion towards yourself. Because understand that people around you are struggling everybody’s struggling at times made the comment yesterday on the podcast. Everybody has struggled with life by default has struggled so there isn’t a situation where somebody’s having an incredible time. And now the only people the only person who’s suffering is you can’t say that. Everybody has some kind of struggle going on. A little bit more patient a little bit more forgiving makes a difference.
Every individual by default has emotions. Every most them. If there isn’t a motion, there’s a possibility for the trigger. So understanding and managing and constructively dealing with them, and you deal with them constructively by fixing issues as they happen so that they stay away from you, but then you also stay away from the path. And then you also move ahead in life in a meaningful way. Okay, that’s all for now. Hopefully, this is helpful. Hopefully, this will hopefully put out what I was thinking. Hopefully, that came outright. That’s all for now, and I will catch up with you tomorrow on tomorrow’s podcast. Stay tuned.