Here is the complete transcript of the podcast
Welcome, or welcome back. Happy Saturday morning to you on the podcast today. Again, I’m answering a question from a listener of my radio show, asking me about why he loses confidence. He says I’m well accomplished. I’m doing very well, professionally, and personally. I’m also very careful with money, finances and all. But people around me tell me that I should have a little bit more courage in doing things. And I should be more assertive, I feel I’m not assertive. And I think I lacked confidence. I tried many things. I heard you talk about hypnosis. So I wanted to find out if hypnosis works. Specifically, when it comes to confidence, is there anything that you can do? Okay, so clearly this, I completely paraphrase this whole question, but you get the idea. So, here’s how I responded to the question. And this podcast, today’s recording, is just simply a representation of what I told this gentleman. So yes, the mind, every time we go through something, mind is always looking for the most simplistic path to the outcome, we want to get over the pain and want to get over the suffering. So this gentleman has a great challenge, which he thinks he could accomplish more, if he could just overcome this hurdle, of confidence.
Now dropping confidence in a situation is very common, even the most elite professionals accomplished, you know, artists, musicians, sports, persons, that drop confidence, and we see their performance going down, we see them going out a form, and all that. So the loss of confidence could happen to anybody at any point in time, it’s very difficult to contain the mind and stay fully concentrated, and keep working on whatever agenda is very hard. That too over a long period of time, is very hard. So can hypnosis help? The answer is yes, but that’s not what I’m doing. That’s not what I’m sharing here. Or I’m not going deep into explaining or taking the route of hypnosis, specifically on the podcast here. But I want to address this in a very generic way that any and everybody regardless of their situation, and regardless of whether they’re interested in hypnosis, or they might be interested in something else, doesn’t matter. This should work for them. That’s my intent in doing this. Now, there’s also another aspect to this, I have personally gone through this, where I lost confidence, across multiple timelines, at different stages of my life on different things. And over the years, I came up with a three-step formula on how to address this. And ever since I started doing this, I have never lost confidence. Regardless, of overall confidence or specific confidence, let’s say a new product is coming up, I need to work at it. I use this formula, and it never fails. So I’m taking an excuse with this question, to share this formula. Now, I’m not saying again that you should not try hypnosis, hypnosis is the fastest way to really instill concentration in still focus. And if this is an issue that is coming from the unconscious part of the mind, absolutely, totally, no second thoughts. But sometimes we also need to do something at a conscious level. So I’m going to address the conscious part here.
There are three things to this. And the three actors in this, the first actor is you. The second actor, other people around you. And the third factor is the unknown. So let’s talk about the first actor, which is you. You see if you analyze the last 24 hours, the last 48 hours, the last 72 hours of everything that you have done. Let’s say you have a camera following you all over the place, let’s say you start documenting the smallest things, smallest least things that you do, you brushed your teeth, or maybe you change your clothes, or maybe you just walked into the kitchen or something, even the smallest things, you start documenting, you will be amazed how many successes you had throughout the day, throughout these two days or three days. But you have to document the problem that people is they do not document that which they do. They say I did this in the morning. I did that in the evening. And in between, I did a few other things throughout the afternoon. But they never really give a specific count on all the activities that they have done.
And if you start looking into all the successes you had, you don’t need much proof anymore. You don’t need any other validation because You did something well. And that’s all there is to this. There is nothing else. Interesting. So you start tabulating all the successes you had. And you also had some failures, maybe you attempted doing a few things that didn’t work out. That’s okay. So you start comparing these two things, and you’ll see they did like maybe 60, 70 things incredibly well. And then maybe two or three things that did not work out for you throughout the day. The mind by default goes into these two or three things and starts creating an identity and narrative around, oh, I am not able to do this, maybe I’m not good at this. All these things are happening in the subconscious. So now you’re detached, you’re removed. And then there are people around who are constantly expecting us to perform, and they in their own moods and melodies, they end up saying things to us, you’re not good, or maybe you’re not capable, something like that, that affects our ego. And now we are even further down the drain.
So the only way to overcome this cautiously is to start tracking things that you’re doing big, small, all kinds of projects that you have on your hand that you do over a period of time, maybe a day or two or three days, and you start looking at them and the brain is looking for validation. And you see these things that you have accomplished throughout the day. That should bring back some level of confidence. Unless you sit there completely invalidating yourself. If that is the case, then you may need some intervention. And hypnosis is a good intervention mechanism. The second is others. The second is others. Now, do you have people in your life who might have gone through the same situation that you are going through right now? Is it possible that your grandfather, your grandmother, or your great great grandfather might have gone through the same challenges that you are going through right now? If not, just make up that thought because there’s some truth to it. Generations and abattoirs went through some difficult challenges. Of course, they did not have cell phones and Wi-Fi’s and social media, and all that stuff. But then they did go through a whole different set of challenges that we are not going through. So you start analyzing their story, whatever, you know, you’ll start seeing, you know, you’ll start relating, and this is why I watch old movies, you know, old movies, you know, they give you the pictorial representation of what was happening 100 years ago, 50 7060 years ago, it’s amazing. If you start thinking that way.
One other way is that you should spend some time reading maybe five or six different biographies, life stories of other people, other successful people. And if you do, if you read 10 books, 10 life stories of 10 people, the chances are and you got to be very judicious, you got to be very clear. In your mind, if you read 10 Or five, there’s a high possibility for sure in time, because I’ve gone through it, if you read 10 life stories, then there shouldn’t be a situation that one individual, out of these 10 stories might have gone through the one that you are going through right now. It’s very hard that none of these 10 Successful people who accomplished a lot became well known on whom books were written. And who wrote books also. And that they have not gone through the problems that you are going through. When I say you, I mean me also, it’s very rare that happens. Okay, so that is there. So I suggest you read books, okay. And if you’re very if you can take your mind there, look into all the relatives, you have all the friends you have and their parents and their friends, and you start finding people and you start kind of putting yourself in their shoes and, and questioning. Did these people go through the problems that I’m going through right now? How did they come back? What was their bounce back? And you start thinking that way, then your lack of confidence completely goes away, and you’re like, okay, like, maybe I don’t have after all my challenges don’t matter. Like that’s where we are taking the mind. Then comes the unknown. And I say unknown because you can fill that unknown part with God, or with a higher power or whatever you believe in.
And here’s what I do in this category, which is if you wake up in the morning, and you start saying thanks for everything like you’re doing a class Water, you say I’m thankful I’m bringing a glass of water, you dry, you get into your car you drive. I’m thankful I’m driving the car. So you talk to a friend, oh, I’m thankful my friend is talking to me or spoke to me, you send an email or thank you for loving me this internet, right? So I’m thankful now that this podcast is getting recorded, I’m 10 minutes or 12 minutes into it. I’ll put an intro and outro and all those things, but roughly at about maybe 10 or nine minutes into the podcast right now. I’m thankful it’s working now. At least I have something to share with you. And I feel good about what I’m sharing with you. So that’s also important. start becoming thankful for the least things. Then there isn’t a moment where you are unhappy or rejected or dull or any of that stuff. So suddenly your pain and this agony you have what whatever things that are not working in your life kind of goes into the backburner because you’re clouding your front-loading your emotions, your mind with a positive and gratitude-driven emotion. So amazing.
This exercise does brilliant things. In fact, they did a reverse experiment on this. About four years ago, when I started texting people, like somebody texts me or somebody emails me, I start the first line with I’m sorry, it starts with I’m sorry. And sorry, I and did a whole podcast on this, saying when I say I’m sorry, I’m giving that you let’s say you’re getting an email from me, and I start with I’m sorry, I’m giving you the power. And I it puts me in a very good position. It doesn’t take it doesn’t diminish me. But at the same time, it doesn’t diminish you obviously, that’s obviously the point. But then it doesn’t do any harm to anyone. Some people say I can’t say that it’s against my ego. You know, I didn’t experiment. In fact, as a result of doing this my quality of life in general, my daily quality life started going up. It’s an interesting experiment, which by the way, I continue to do. So there is a high possibility that if you’ve ever gotten an email from me, and you’ll listen to this podcast, then go back and look into some of my emails, you’ll find me using sorry. And I genuinely say that dogs have become part of my life. So I really, I paint myself below everyone. I don’t I even paint myself above. I never walk into a conversation, or in a situation thinking I know more than that individual. It doesn’t I don’t do this podcasting. I know more than, you know the way. I have no idea who’s listening to this, how can I say no more than you? It doesn’t. In fact, that’s my last thing. Now I’m like, I don’t know anything. Let me make an attempt. Let me record something. Let’s see what people say. As simple as that. So it will become tangible to the smallest things. It’s a good life. So three things you others and God, or unknown or higher power, whatever. And I promise you, this should bring you back into life. That’s the first step to gaining confidence. Try doing this a few times, we are going to a challenge. That’s exactly what I told this gentleman via email. And of course, there are many tools that are available and many different mechanisms. And there are many different interventions that you can try to overcome confidence-related issues and confidence. Also, when you have a confidence issue, that could be some other underlying issues. Also, this experiment, this three-step process also addresses those underlying things also.
Okay, that’s all for now. I hope this is helpful. If it is do me a favor. Write a comment, wherever you’re listening to this, maybe you’re watching this on YouTube, there should be a place for you to comment you’re listening to this on a podcasting app should be a place for you to write a comment to and rate the podcast. That’s all for now. I never intended this podcast to become at this code this longer, but once I’m dialed in, I’m really dialed in. So whatever little bit of the Saturday you have, depending upon where you are in the world, enjoy your Saturday and I’ll catch up with you as early as tomorrow. Thank you.