Here is the complete transcript of the podcast
On the podcast today, we are going to continue our discussion that I started on Monday, the 26th of December, where I said, I’m going to share maybe five or six things with you, that are going to prepare you and keep you and kind of predispose you to success in 2023. Whatever success you have in your mind, this is something that I’m applying in my life today as I’m doing this. So we started with 26. On Monday, I talked about cultivating outcome thinking yesterday, I talked about masterminding with Masters. And today, I want to spend some time and talk about communication. Something that I don’t think we do a lot, I don’t think we give a lot of time to it. But as much as we don’t want to think about it, it is a significant aspect of any success at home at work, and wherever outside doesn’t matter. Communication is the key to success. If you have challenges at home, one night between you and your significant other your spouse, your partner will tell you nine out of 10 times it could be because of communication, you have issues at work, nine out of 10 times its communication, you are not able to make friends build relationships outside communication. Seriously, nine out of 10 times, I’m not saying all the times nine out of 10 times that’s significant. So if I have to title today’s podcast episode, then I would title it as master the science of communication. Let’s talk about the word science. Science means there is data, there is research, and all that.
Now if you Google science of communication, the thing that pops up on the very top is grammar, phrases, proper etiquette in writing, and speaking, and all that. That is not what I’m going to focus on today on the podcast. This is science by science, what I mean is completely different than the science you find wherever other people are referring to see, science is the reason why I’m using the word sciences because it’s a feeling. So the idea is to become scientific with communication. It’s not about mastering grammar, or mastering a certain tonality, or certain things, whatever. And there are many people who focus on those things. If I was supposed to, or if I’m asked to go through a process of learning communication, and going through proper training and schooling and all that on the topic of communication that I think I’m going to fail, I don’t consider myself to be a good communicator, this is something that I’m improving every year. Luckily, from the day that I started thinking about it, I have continued to grow. I’m not there. But I wish I would do better, I could do better. So again, what 2023 I’m focusing a lot on this. Okay, let’s get into the science, or at least the way I think the sciences of communication. You see, there are only two things, one is listening. And the other is speaking and listening. And sometimes we speak without words. Sometimes we listen without our ears. So we listen with our ears, obviously, but also with our eyes. And sometimes we don’t need to use these two, you can close your eyes, and you can completely close your ears. But still, you can listen and that is using the power of the mind. So there are three ways we listen. Now, of course, there is you can add some other things to this, but these are the primary three things to stop. We’re speaking for a second, we speak with our mouths. But we also speak with our eyes. And certainly, we speak with our bodies too. So on the listening side, we have ears, eyes, and minds.
On the speaking side, we have eyes, mouths,s and bodies of course. You know you can speak with the mind but when you speak your mind you’re only speaking to yourself so you’re not speaking to anybody else. A common part between these two categories is thinking. So on the podcast, I’ve gone on to say this multiple times, words do not just happen. Words are the representation of what’s happening inside the speaker. And I also said that words modify the speaker before they modify the listener. So words impact the speaker before they impact the listener or anybody outside of the speaker. So thinking is the bridge thinking is important. So the way you think, and defines how you listen, how you process what you’re listening to. And, of course, the way you speak, has a lot to do with your thinking. So multiple podcast episodes here. And I was highlighting one of my very, I say, one of my best reads ever, one of the best books that I read, if not the best, but one of the best books, is by an incredible author, let’s give him an incredible book on communication. I think he’s the best when it comes to his research and his study and his presentation, numerous ideas, and numerous techniques he has shared as a part of his journey here on Earth. But then I as a speaker, on the radio, at seminars, workshops, doing what I do, and here on this podcast, there are three things that I learned. And I want to share with you, by the way, I want you to, I want you to study every book on communication. That’s why I’m not really highlighting a book because every book that I have read, Every book has contributed in some way, there is always a lesson that is impossible that you open a book and you read a couple of pages in you and you don’t get a message, or a lesson or a takeaway from it. I don’t think that’s possible. So every book on communication is, is what reading or what giving a try. But there are three things I want to share with you today as a part of this podcast, which I want to practice even more in 2023. That’s the idea.
The first and foremost is to be real with what you say. Because you see, it’s your character to let your persona that comes out as you’re speaking. So why use complex words why use unnecessary framing of ideas like languaging or, or words or phrases to frame things that you want to convey? There’s no need for all that. I mean, I see speakers spend hours together trying to get to the point, there’s no need for all that material. It’s okay if I make a mistake here. And if I say I’m sorry, here, or I say, um, or, you know, whatever. Good gentleman listeners would be okay because they know that I’m coming from a good place. And I’m not trying to fabricate things simply. So keep it real, I want to keep it more real in 2023. That’s my pursuit personal pursuit. I think I have kept it very real here this far, but I want to keep it even more real starting in 2023 The second part of communication is Being kind. There is no need to be harsh with words, there is ice I see that no need for all that there is absolutely nothing. If you are presenting something where there is a value mismatch. That means the listener is unhappy with what you’re saying or you are not being accepted. Then be kind still you can be kind, you could be kind on the extreme in front of extreme aggression. You could be the choice.
So I’ve seen people make the choice. In front of extreme aggression thrown at them. They have shown a tremendous amount of poise and, and a tremendous amount of character and did not participate in the digression and they’re kind of To the aggressor, and then, you know, they stuck behind and walked away. So if there is a value mismatch in any situation, then you know, you have a choice to step back, you don’t need to step forward on step over other people, there’s no need for that. And finally, the last one that I want to share with you, is being formed. You know, do research, study, get, acquire knowledge, and information, and make sure that whatever you are communicating, in fact, is helping you. And any communication for the sake of communication is a waste of time. So, study all the tips ever on communication, and study all the books on communication, but these three things are my observations. And I’ll be practicing this even more. And there is not like, I’m very real, you couldn’t be even more real. There’s not like I’m crying, you could be even kinder. And it’s not like I’m informed, you could be even more informed. So this is what I’ll be doing for myself in 2043. And this is my science by the way. Let’s do this. This is my science.
Okay, I want to stop here. And tomorrow on the podcast, what I’ll do, I was thinking, How do I structure this, do tune in because this is what is going to become all these are essential for success. All these are going to prepare you for if I were you, I’m going to get a book on communication and read it. Okay, if I video I will literally do it. I’m going to buy a book on communication and read the book seriously, and, get the book by Les Gibson, on how to have confidence in power in dealing with people. That’s the book. I’ll start with that book. And that book is incredible book focuses a lot on communication, and all have difficulty dealing with people. You’re challenged, you don’t know where to start, or how to go about it. Get the book, read them before the end of this year. Get it done. Okay. That’s all for now. You take care. I’ll be with you tomorrow. I promise you tomorrow. It’s gonna be a good one.