Here is the complete transcript of the podcast
Today on the podcast, I want to take a few moments. And I want to highlight something that as a professional, you may be going through right now, or you might have gone through in the past. And I assure you, if you’re a success-minded individual, that means you take accountability for your actions, you work towards your dreams, and you make yourself responsible for everything that happens in your life, you will eventually go through this. And the specific feeling that I want to highlight today is something related to identity, something related to who you are, you being the real you. You see life puts us in situations where we have to end up doing things that we don’t like, you have to make the money so that you can pay the bills, you have taken on a huge mortgage, maybe, maybe your expenses are there that you can’t avoid. And maybe you are a single-income earner in the family, whatever may be the situation, we end up doing things that we don’t want to do, we want to be something different, we want to enjoy life, maybe you want to explore life at a different level, not in any extreme way. But it’s just that we want to be happy. And the work we do. The place where we live, the relationship that we have, all these things have to be contained, all have all these things have to be brought together in a way that everything makes sense. And it’s not about swing wealth, it’s not about becoming rich none. Even though we know that making money is not going to make us happy or become wealthy is not going to solve the problems. But somehow we are caught up with it. And in the process, we are doing things that we otherwise don’t want to do. You know, the job is not right. But you end up doing the job, you know, that you should stand up for something that is incorrect. And you have to voice your opinion, you have to take a stance but you choose not to. Because if you do, then you’re compromising 30 Other things behind. So you give in and you cave in.
Now, for some people, it’s okay to do it occasionally. But then what happens if that becomes a pattern? Well, for the majority of our life, we end up living somebody else’s life. We end up living our parent’s life. For a long time, by the time those values fade. We start discovering life that we really thought is ours. When we have children, our children start growing, they teach us things. And we start to realize that we got sandwiched between our parents and our children. And then by the time we really graduate through all the stages, we don’t have enough life left. So the question becomes says, we clearly have multiple identities. We clearly have multiple complexes, and then multiple core relationships within which we exist.
The question is how can we become real? What can we do to become real? So that we claim our identity? We define who we are. And we set goals, agendas, and trajectories that we want to accomplish for ourselves. That’s what I want to highlight today on the podcast. How can we become authentic? How can you become authentic? One of the challenges I had with this podcast was there are so many people who do what I do. I’m no different. Nothing I’m sharing there is different, nothing I do is different. Nothing is unique about me. There are speakers who speak better than me and who are gifted. There are people who do hypnosis better than I do. There are people who, everything I see people, and I’m happy for them. So I look at somebody who is more successful than me or who has something that I do not have. My mind goes, What can I do to have what this individual has? My mind never goes and says, How come they have what I have? Why do they have what I have? None. Never, that mindset has not been there mentally ever in my life. And my mind is, what can I do? What do they do that’s different? And how can I do that? How can I learn?
That’s where it all starts. So at the end of today’s podcast, I want you to discover who you are. We talk about passions. We talk about dreams, we talk about skills and gifts and all that, and every podcast you go back and listen to there is a reference that I have made here. But then the question becomes is how can you become authentic? And one of the things that I have done here on this podcast because many people do what they do what I do, and they do better than what I do. So one of the things I did here is, how can I say? Or how can I express myself? Where the listener on the other side listens and gets a feel or gets a sense? That, yes, is what this guy is saying. Makes sense. I see myself in what he’s saying. That was the thought process. So I was not trying to do something, or at least even from the beginning itself. Sometimes I show up here excited, sometimes I show up here unprepared. But nowhere along the way. I do this because I have to do this. I’m not recording a podcast because I put a quarter podcast, even though the fear is there. Sometimes I wake up and think what will I say today, that’s going to make sense. It’s not going to make sense to the listener, listening makes sense to me. So that’s the level that I want to attain every day. So I will not do anything. These are some of the commitments I made to myself, but I’m not seeking validation from the listener, even though I say that pay read the podcast with the podcast, you’re watching this on YouTube, you know, whatever I say those things, those are customary, those things need to be said. But that doesn’t imply any level of validation, or I’m not seeking that. So that’s the first level of authenticity here, which is don’t seek validation in what you’re doing. See, you are unique, you are being placed here. Who knows who placed us who knows how long is going to go, nobody knows that. So don’t seek any validation you are who you are. And in every sense, you are correct. In whatever you’re thinking about yourself. So there is nobody else’s validation you need, then one of the things I decided was to see if you do a podcast every day. And if I get into this mindset of I need to speak right? Clearly, English is not my first language, I mess up things here. Sometimes I lose my thought. And by this time here, several minutes into this podcast, I might have lost my thought multiple times. And it’s hard because this is not me. I don’t want to become a great speaker or an orator or whatever. You know, that’s not my goal. I do this because I have to convey some thoughts. That’s all there is to this. So never took a class where I learned how to speak, or how to become a good public speaker, none of that. I’ve read multiple books. But the goal was not to become a great speaker or make speaking a profession. No. So I make mistakes. And I’m not afraid of making mistakes. I’m not perfect. Nobody is. So the message here is don’t be afraid of making mistakes. It’s okay, we learn, we move on. And eventually, all our learnings will have some cumulative effect along the way. And we turn out to be good in the end. And whatever the good is, I don’t know what it is. And it is what it is. If it is it is what it is. If it is not it’s okay. Perfectly fine. One other way, is, for example, I do this podcast here. I don’t edit this. It’s not like occasionally maybe a word. Or two, we edit that out. What? That’s it. That’s all there is to it. And I said that multiple times here. Now, I never edit the sense. I never edit the message. I don’t move words around. Doesn’t make any sense. Okay. So if the word that I gave you is that I don’t edit this podcast, I don’t edit this podcast. That’s the word I have to keep. So if you want to become authentic, keep your word. Sometimes I do not keep my word because of things that are beyond my reach. For example, I say I’ll call you back. I forget. I say I’m going to send this via email, but I forget. It’s not good. And there is no excuse for it.
That compromises integrity. So if you give a word you’re killed the word but happens with me that can be improved. So I take notes, I write down notes, and I have a notebook I carry everywhere. I use a notebook I carry everywhere. All my podcasting ideas, everything all my commitments are written down. And this is something that I practice now. I have become pretty consistent with my word over the last few years. But before that, I was horribly late to events to places. I just couldn’t keep my word. The next one here is I will never do anything to please you My 20s and 30s, yes, now No, no need to please anyone, listen, you will please others if you’re afraid to be alone. If you are alone, and you’re okay to be alone, there is no need to please anyone. So, people-pleasing, saying things to make somebody happy. If I have to praise you, I’m authentic in my praise. I genuinely mean it. And that’s all I will not praise you. Because I want to, you know, somehow put you on the top so that you will, like me doesn’t make any sense don’t do it doesn’t work. It’s a lot of effort, a lot of energy, misdirected energy, and there is a finite amount of energy. In each one of us, it doesn’t make any sense to do it. So it’s tiring. In order to really live an authentic life, you need to live in the present. So even though I’m recording this, there are distractions, I’m looking at my screen. And I took a couple of notes on my podcast on the page, and I’m looking at that, but I have some distractions as I’m recording the podcast. But as a professional, I should be not conveying that distraction over the mic into your ears. I shouldn’t be. And if it happens a lot, it means I’m not living in the present majority of this podcast, I’m in the present. I’m completely dialed in as I’m doing this, but maybe there are some distractions here and there. And that is perfectly fine. It’s okay. Okay, then the last one I want to share with you here is not being true to your values, a majority of my workshops and seminars, were to help people discover their values, if the values themselves, or the foundation, if the values are not discovered, that means you don’t identify with the values, you don’t spend time telling yourself, these are my values, then it becomes harder to build anything, just a foundation for the house or the castle that you’re trying to build. And those values have to be understood on a daily basis. So every day in the morning, I wake up, and I look at my values. And I say I’m gonna do everything to satisfy these values, I have six values that I want to satisfy every day, and are the constant, they are not values, keep moving, keep shifting, so I need to bring in new values, I have to drop some old values along the way because I’m graduating to this my timeline. But core values really don’t shift as much. So whatever those core values are, two, or three or four core values, they don’t shift, they don’t change. They are who they are, and they define you. So your job is to identify what those values are. So that every time you do anything, your job is to satisfy those values, as long as you’re satisfying those values, you’re happy. And that’s the happiness game.
Now how do you become authentic? So these are the things that you should do should not do. But there is a formula to becoming authentic. And this has to do with happiness. So let me share this formula with you. So wherever you are right now, who are you? Who am I? Just a question I get. And there are many philosophers, many experts who have already spoken about this. But then one of the most simplest ways to discover who you are, is to look into yourself today and say, what makes you happy? What are you doing right now that makes you happy? If I’m doing this podcast, I’m not happy, then it’s off. It’s completely off and if you want to get this, you can listen to this. And you’ll figure out the guy’s doing this podcast completely unhappily. So you got to look into things that you’re doing right now, and see what makes you happy. Whatever that is. That’s what it is. That’s your authentic self. Now, go back into your past, and look into some things that made you happy. What made you happy? So it means who you are is what makes you happy? Now, who are you Where is what made you happy in the past? Clearly, future happiness will also come from what do you want to become? So who are you? Who are you who do you want to become?
These are the three questions if you answer these questions, then pretty much your life is set. And this has nothing to do with money, no power, no position, none of that stuff, it just no titles, none. Not about bringing in 20 other different ideas and starting 15 different investments and 20 different businesses. Doesn’t make any sense. Yesterday I was talking about one thing. So this is it. You figure these three questions, you will discover the authenticity you think that’s all I had for today, in my mind. Don’t want to say this. I don’t want to extend this. So that’s all for now. Have a wonderful Saturday, and I’ll catch up with you sorry this went longer. I’ll catch up with you Sunday morning I’ll wake up we’ll record the forecast so that’s all for now take care, bye.